I draw on cigarettes,
Doodle with resin-
Blisters on my fingers,
They all think I'm playin'.
The colors brown & red
Are escaped when I shut my eyes,
And when I turn my face inside
I'm fine with what I see.
It's not dark, pretty light-
It's all clear skies,
Even with a chance of showers
There's always a sunrise.

New
Like the dawn
The glorious sunrise
Pinkish hues awash with silent beiges
And the sun
Is a fiery orb
Coloring life into every living thing

I feel the new
With my breath
In and out
And I think of the ocean
The powerful ocean
I can feel it within my heart,
The waves rumbling through my veins

I can see the new
In not so distant visions
Of a future full of growth
I’ve healed so much
And yet there’s more
More of the new
I open my doors
Let it all in
All the gloriously soothing beauty
Of life’s simplest pleasures
Healing me

There’s been a crack made in my lifelong illusions
I’m beginning to feel clarity, and not confusion
Saying yes yes yes
To more beauty.

I know very
Well that
I haven’t been
The greatest
At love,

I haven’t chased
Grand gestures or vows,
But stumbled through
The mornings after,
The movie dinners,
The silences
Between us
Where love sits,
Waiting to be noticed,
Not a princess in a tower
Waiting to be saved,
But just two people,
Trying to stay close
Despite the gaps.

I don’t know if
I’ve loved the
Imperfections,
I’ve loved despite
Them,
The realization hits
Like a slasher movie,
Too late at night,
And too young
And unsupervised,

Sometimes I leave
Notes hidden in
Vases, behind cabinets,
Above the fridge,
And in the pockets
Of the new jeans
That I just got,
As a reminder to love,

Today I found one
In my glove compartment,
It’s getting cooler so
I rolled down the windows
And felt the breeze
Every time there was a red light,
I had the music loud,
Enjoying the mess of genres
That’s my Spotify playlist,
And I savored the moment,
In solitude, learning to love,
Not despite, but because of.

Vanity, take your measurements -
Tailor me a suit to cover all character.
Take all discretion, only
As to whether I'm dressed pleasant
And wear a guise that's hygienic.
It's all very copacetic,
A couple of sweet words
More akin to syrup than cane;
Unnatural and fake.

Do I speak in cryptic ways,
Vague, and detached from
The normal? Do words lash out
In resemblances of diatribes
That drown out all else meaning?
It is not on purpose,
I read too much
Or, I've read.
Pandora's box opened,
Atop Babel's tower,
Clawing my way back up
Not to shut the lid
But change direction, orientation