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dreamers light the sky
as precious untold stories
glow among darkness
 Sep 2014 Rose Claire
Ari
I walked to you,
hoping I would have a chance.
I limped back every
single time
*defeated
cutting people off doesnt have limits. family can get cut off too if theyre causing you stress. eliminate any negativity from your circle.
 Sep 2014 Rose Claire
AJ
Rum Chata
 Sep 2014 Rose Claire
AJ
I will be drunk in a few minutes.
It's only noon.
Just the perfect time to throw
Everything up
And out the window again.
The river of blood
From my thighs to the tile
Runs a mere .13% BAC.
 Sep 2014 Rose Claire
AJ
1.) Out of the one thousand and ninety-nine days that you were mine, I only regret three of them. The day Brian ***** me on that pool table, the day your dad moved back to Italy and I didn't come over, and the day you put yourself into this hellish suicide coma.
2.) If truth or dare turned two little girls into temporary lesbians, than so be it. Honestly, nothing ever tasted sweeter than you on that night on the bathroom counter at Tim's.
3.) I will grow up to be incredibly cultured all because of you. I learned to look outside the social norm after our late night dates on the roof. Getting high in your lap as you read me poetry, and played me Damien Rice's The Professor & La Fille Danse on repeat was more than enough.
4.) I always thought you were tradition and I was your French Revolution. But now I'm seeing that I was the revolution, and you were the revelation.
5.) You could not sing a single god ****** note. But the only thing I want to hear is your squeaky voice serenading me with our song right now. I promise I won't be annoyed, just finish chorus with me one more  ******* time.
6.) I would have helped you get to your father. I would have helped you. I would have set your mother on fire to avoid this.
7.) I threw up when I got sams phone call about what you had done. And then I screamed at him for an hour.
8.) I won't ask how could you do this to me, because right now I want to do it to you.
9.) Thank you for punching Brian, and I'm sorry you got fired, and I'm sorry your dad left, and I'm sorry your mom hit you, and I'm sorry that I could not kidnap you and bring you to our own private island in the middle of no wear.
10.) You showed me what star you'd become when you died, and told me that if I wished on it you would do your best. I know absolutely nothing about astrology and constellations. But your star is the one thing I find faster than the moon in every night sky.
11.) The last sip of every bottle of ***** I will ever have, will always taste like the last kiss we shared.
I don't know.
I just found out that you died on Sunday.
You took the right combination
Of pills this time.
And that feels wrong,
Because your favorite day was Tuesday.
And your mother didn't even allow
An Obituary in the paper.
And sam and I will never forgive ourselves,
For destroying all you photos.
I have none left to remember you by.

But I found your star in the sky tonight.
I wonder about the wind,
the one that
flows through the trees
moves the clouds through the sky
carries the birds off the ground
plays a song out my door
makes leaves spin in fall
taps on my window at night.
I wonder if it’s you,
surrounding me tight
pushing me to keep walking
brushing my hair from my face
whispering ever so quietly
that every thing will be all right.
I love you* I thought,
as you sat across the table,
wishing I could say it out loud
and grab your hand and cry.
but I laugh at my thoughts
because their validity is questionable:
wishing to say something
and wanting to say it
are completely different concepts.

when you wish for something
it’s out of your control,
a silent hail-mary pass
to a blind wide receiver.
but wanting something
is more than just an action or a feeling
it’s a state of being
that will overcome body and mind,
and achieving that want
is all that matters.

So I might wish
that I could say that I love you,
but what I really mean
it that I want to love you.
and that’s why I don’t say it.
because I know I don’t.
I have a hundred different memories of you,
a few more prominent than the rest,
but they're all good. I would tell you them,
but that would take hours, so I'll skip ahead.
The ending's the same, anyways (you won't miss much)-
You're The Best! are always the last three
words. I also want to say, I appreciate you,
because I know I can always rely
on you. And I love you, and I wish you
the Happiest Mother's Day!

5/10/14
PPropper
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