pretending that he heard me
pretending that he cared
pretending that this crazy feeling
was something that we shared
pretending God had planned this out
and it was sure to be
pretending that it wasn't just
a fantasy and me

not everyone
deserves to know
the things that you've been though.
              not everyone
              will see you grow
              transform into something new.
                                not everyone
                                you hold on to
                                equally wants to stay.
                                                    not everyone
                                                    will­ understand
                                                    wh­y things are better off this way.
     not everyone you talk to
     not everyone you kiss
     not everyone that holds you close when sunlight starts to dip
  
                         not every "forever" lasts much long
                         maybe that's okay
                         maybe it's just how life is
                         there's nothing more to say

just kids
getting high when your parents aren't home
hoping no one hears us
or sees us climb into the hot tub
half naked
on a cold night
with a blunt in one hand
and my hand in the other

i was scared and drunk and looking for you
so what do you mean
"Do you even like me?"