Sometimes we float on a surfice
Of a calm sea
Silent tenderness is lulling us
Back and forth on a watery bed
Pumping blood slowly
Other times we rage and scream
Loudly and messy
Lungs filled with passion
Hands itching for touch
It's a dark night again and lonely
Sleep avoids me
Just a slow hunger eats
Coldness and fear
Love and lust

I have seen a lot, yet I've -
not seen enough.
It’s all been gone for so long now,
And time has forgotten us.

Mangled, crude, palettes of motion,
dizzying the senses;
All trying to deactivate,
and acknowledge the moment.

… You are eternal in thought.

I haven’t seen enough. You still
tell me, a lot.
Our faces will change in the night,
but yore memories will not.

Melodious, compulsive, silences in rhythm,
enrapturing harmonics;
Desperate to inseminate,
in which, we are broken.

… You are eternal in me.

the butterfly poets
they forgot when they crawled
they forgot about the loneliness of being inside of the cocoon

He loved with the cruelty of nature
growing like ivy on my heart;
I'd cut him away but he'd only return

He nestled in my branches
making a home out of my rotting shell,
forgetting home is where the heart is

He said "destruction was a form of beauty"
So he pretended to be reborn a hurricane
Firing open doors better left closed in his wake

At times, it was better to hide from him
Wait out the storm and pretend
everything was perfectly alright

Then when it was all over
He'd kiss my wounds,
grow flowers from my dying veins

But not so long after they would wilt
because even the sweetest of things
couldn't survive within our own toxicity.

lately happiness seems to come and go
like a lover who bores easily
as i don't offer them enough to stay
while the depression always returns
like an abuser, it's fists made of ravage fire
masquerading loyalty and love i know is insincere

My mind keeps pictures of you up on its walls
                            again
                         ­         and again
I find my thoughts drifting down that river of memory
orbiting around you, like forces of gravity drawn
to the idea of us (if there even is an us)

If I could then I’d lock you outside my brain, leave you out there to rot
in the abyss, where your words couldn't penetrate me
and your lips that work like anesthesia forbidden to numb me again

I won't do you the injustice of romanticizing your imperfections
You're no nebular, you're a black hole, a gaping flaw in creation
Your eyes that held millenniums of history, now hold me no future

You made me forget what it feels to have stability
To not walk out of a room and forget why I left
You make me want to shred the skin you touched
Like a reptile, to become reborn, purified from my past.

There never were any butterflies in your stomach, only parasites
but you fed them to me readily like a disease

So no, I won’t dedicate you another love poem
                 no I want (deserve) better
This isn't what love should be
I’ll write you a poem where the words convulse on the page
and you’ll forget to read it (you always do)