Look at him, he walks so perfectly in the, morning moments,
I don't think he can see what he used to be like to me.
It seemed like, his innocent soul wanted me so much,
and I wanted him so badly back to also join me in hand.

Now I look at him, he's matured, I wonder if it was too much,
he's passed the days that I should be entering.
I probably, ruined most of his days,
which he could have been, flirting and chattering away with girls.
Prettier, smarter and potential I wish I had, but never ever had a chance.

Now I see, I am just a loner in disguise.
I honestly hate the feeling of the air, pushing into my lungs full of despair,
I just simply want to make my way alone again.
But what happened to that boy? The one who spent nights with me on the phone,
it's like he erased himself from life completely.
I just wonder to myself, was it because of me?
Did he feel like he needed to mature?

Because honestly, I don't feel maturity, at all,
it's like he isolated romance on another world.
I know he tries, I know he cares, he tells me a million times a day,
but why do I feel so sickened by how I feel deep inside?
The life of a loner in disguise.

The unique buds of magic, the wondrous feeling of scents.
I can't bare to stay here in this abyss, the abyss of isolation.
The flowerbeds grow from despair, witheringly when they finally gain,
the feeling of yesterday being poured away.
I should never have bothered with grace, graceful elegance left me behind,
I know it's impossible to do the things they proclaim, I know it's impossible,
to be the way I always see my face in the fabricated world.

Listen daughter, in the future of mine, never let these people push you behind.
Curiosity sometimes rightfully takes over your will, for I was curious too on how I live.
I never wanted you to fall down this hole, please return to me in my future arms.
I couldn't bare to see the desires I once had be wiped away from me.
Scattered like ashes, of used-to-bes, nobody deserves pure hatred,
nobody deserves to feel alone.

I know daughter of mine, when I see your hair shine in the lights of the world,
slowly forming into the explosions of used-to-be life which will be left behind, please hold me tight.
There are too many flowers in this garden, the ones who grow violently shiver those who cry, the ones who are left behind to wither into nothingness should be the ones remembered internally.
I can't hold the thought of desperation, the feelings that I wish would go away from me.
The hands that I once wanted to caresses me are now the ones I wish would bleed.

I no longer want life to be, a spiraling act of infinity.
Please.

I come with an empty bottle guarantee
Take all of me.
If you're not happy with what you received
send me back empty
no questions asked.
And I'll return all our memories.

Eating hot dogs in D.C.
Late night breaks at truck stops
during our 28 hour round trip to see what made me.

You can play me like a violin
or use me to wipe your tears away.
If I am out of tune
or if I'm not absorbent enough
send me back used.

Treat me like a balloon
I'll be there when your kidneys fail
with a message of hope just for you.
But if that is not enough
send me back deflated.
I'll pay the postage.

Unfortunately, if you order now
I come with nothing else.
Just me, and what you see.
If I don't fill you up
send me back empty
and I'll return all our memories.