People say his smile is wider,
His opportunities are growing,
He feels more lighter.

If people knew how beautiful,
This man can be when they don't see,
His eyes are chocolate dreams.

I worked so hard to be that one,
To stay aside and let you know,
It's safe to be loved by me.

Someone you love.

There is charcoal on my arms,
Yet they used to be wood,
You'd think the moisture from my eyes,
Would make the bark feel good.

But I keep playing with the flames,
Running my fingers through the light,
Yet I always end up wondering,
Why burn marks get on my heart.

I've seen a few different flames,
Ones of various strength and colour,
But yours seemed so warm,
Like a campfire in the dark.

But I find myself again, with charcoal hands,
For my branches dry out quick,
And it's just too easy,
for you to come and burn down all of this.

I always think it'll change,
Like I'll be the final flower,
To bloom amongst the flames,
But the smoke just ends up suffocating me again.

My sunflower friends ask me if you didn't realise,
They thought maybe he plays too rough,
But I'm tired of being not enough,
Your obliviousness isn't my flaw.

Suppose that's what hurts in the end,
To know I'm not the flawed one,
But your strings of fake security,
Are what leaves permanent scarring on my face.

Push me aside,
I'm an obstacle, right?
You need that goal so tempting, so rich,
So you push me aside.

A red flame, a blazing blitz,
A rich burn consuming my skin,
Your droplets of hopeful flames,
Dance my skin to remains.

How many times can the wicker man burn,
Before the glow within my lava flow,
Rips to bits pouring through.

A love with a mother of the unknown,
Treasured flowers and vanity growth,
All left as I'm pushed aside, placing duty above pride.

Thought I was a phoenix but maybe I'm dumb,
Each burn and cut left me further undone,
Screeches of serenity, mental abuse,
It wasn't just you.

How many times must I burn,
Before my flesh turns to bones.
It's very clear I'll take no more,
It's about time my hand shows.

You said this love was temporary,
Until you found a new one.

Why should I be left,
Because I'm not traditional.

Your cheeky ways blow my mind,
I'm thinking of you all the time.

My heart pounds loud,
Especially without you.

But I can't live,
Without saying I love you.

Maybe you'd hoped for a different time,
But I had to do this for us to find...

The beauty that is known as us,
For every memory I'm grateful of.

A part of me hopes you never fall in love again,
Just so I can keep you in my arms forever.

The whishing of a morning wind,
Rustling within my brain.

Warmth brewing beneath my lips,
Pulsating heart of dark rain.

The more greed my heart forms,
The disgust in myself is held strong.

I'm prideful with the fluid of love,
Yet nobody, cares for my waterfall ride.

White dress shimmer in the sun,
Black hair filled with stars.

A skin of history feels so old,
Mapping out journey forevermore.

A stiff upper lip to hold pride,
For not only me and who I am.

Feel my toes within the seashore,
Aloha Oe.

A hui hou kākou,
Are words a younger me once meant.

As my fruit withers,
To renew the soils again.

A hui hou kākou,
Are words I mean again.

The flame of our world is beautiful,
Creation of warm atmospheric euphoria.

To feel an emotional caress of my cheek,
Followed by a gasp of sun kisses on my head.

He came for raindrops falling on rear mirrors,
I never intended to see the ocean so blue.

She came here to remind herself more of you,
But it isn't what I feel she wants to do.

For a life so bright to come into mine,
Like a candle flame dimming away.

Do you really want this life I give?
I'm shocked you never stayed.

I've tempted my rebellious mind,
But I lost my sense of wrong and right.
That can be abused in a world,
of white/black thinking.
Learning to be an adult,
Not a kid innit.

I don't want to be the right and wrong,
I'm a deep grey mush trying to grow up.
Your poison filled me, like a sadistic goodbye,
I'm sick and tired of wasting my own time.

Hold them closer, people ask me,
But I ain't here to suffocate nobody.
Try to analyse my life with checklists,
But I'm managing fine, just let me.

Not everything can be written down,
I just wanted to learn to let it all out.
I feel like a fool living in this game,
I wonder how much my palms will take.

I give my heart the best I can,
Fluttering my feathers inside with glee,
Yet when I speak it is met with me - Silence.

A long everlasting love affair,
Working hard each day with a new pain,
Yet when I speak it is met with me - Silence.

A family tree extended consistently,
A new face along with a name,
Yet when I speak it is met with me - Silence.

You want me to express myself?
I'm sorry, your light and heart is important,
Yet when I speak, I've just learned not to,
I'm giving up not on myself, but you.

I got red lipstick, dedicated to my old ways of a diva,
your there, with a cheek full of blush, darkened eyes.
It's like magic, feeling this intoxicated love, wow.

Your kisses are all over my mind, I just want them,
I want to feel your chest like, let me linger, let me touch your heart,
kiss me until I'm dead, poison me violently tonight.

I feel like I just turn this all on like streetlights,
or a blaze among this wind, rip my life into an inferno,
drinking isn't fun without a friend, I just want you here again,
I can't remember the clock tower's chimes when my mind is in awe.

Church bells ring, they must sound like needles within your heart,
for me it's something new, a fun experience and an adventure,
I want to kiss you as well, my mind is in a daze but I don't care,
it's okay if it's a mistake, I'll enjoy it, it's a part of the fun.

I just want to know the boy laying within this man,
I feel if life was different we could, find a new little secret talk,
something that could take over this world, but you won't let me turn it up.

I understand I can be wrong, my decisions are terrible,
but my taste, it's a fine watery Merlot, coated in sicking fun,
I know I can be wrong, but the fun it remains and I want you there.

Drinking isn't fun without a friend.

All you need is a lingering touch,
Suffocating breath,
Lasting eyes locked.

Sometimes you need a charming smile,
A ***** mind,
Breaths intertwined.

A gentle hug, worth more than a million kisses,
A physical touch, begging for more than this,
An illicit affair coated in bliss.

Just think of me,
That's all I want.

Shed my skin away,
All my work has undoubtedly undone,
I knew I would ruin myself in this mess.

I've been unsure if I'd lose the one,
We all yearn for something more,
His flames shone brighter than a lighthouse.

I think it's safe to say I'm wasted water,
Left amongst charcoal leaves ripped apart,
I thought my body would remain bruised.

Instead I felt myself, burned to a crisp,
Dignity left pealing my bark away,
I don't understand how you could hurt me.

I tried to get the best for you,
Pushing myself up and beyond to minimum,
But you would rather leave before then.

Is it just myself to blame,
Ripping parts of my body to bits.

Why was it so easy
to hide my blushing smile
than it is to hide
my devastated cries.

The ram is leaving the farm soon,
I felt myself chip away.
All of the songs you haven't heard,
began pulsating a sensation of pain.
Small gasps of air, but understanding,
I can't force you to stay here.
But I made the barn a place to relax,
to see you walk away devastates.

The ram is readying to go soon,
It's enjoying it's final suppers.
I really hope I can enjoy a meal,
knowing the Ram had it in store.

The Ram is leaving soon,
I checked for them each day.
I would always stare towards the sun,
wishing the ram a better day.

The ram, it's not staying,
A sense of denial, laughter and suffering.
Who will accompany the lonely bull now?
If the ram has gone away.

I've developed a fragile heart,
It makes me afraid of change.
I want to show you love,
But I fear you won't feel the same.

Your respect is strong and rigid,
But my heart is warm and pumping.
So I feel myself falling in love,
In the ways I feel I shouldn't.

You're stories birthed amongst the stars,
Makes my heart start growing leaves.
You said the fog was way too thick,
To see the constellations.

You were all my heart craved,
Under a mistletoe Christmas.
But even this year I'm alone,
Because you're not the one in it.

Each poem I write comes to an end,
But my heart feels the same.
The pumping, the butterflies and sick,
I'd do anything for you to feel the same.

You think you're keen,
You see my eyes,
My shift in key.

You think you're smooth,
But what if you knew,
My shift was because of your tune.

Exhausted by excitement,
Followed up by daily activity.
You feel yourself paralyzed in fear,
Nobody else would even begin to...
Speak, you're trying your hardest to speak.

Yet everyone hears my shouts
As whispers
In the night.

My tender Ram, why have you become so confused?
Your flame made you feel like somebody worth intimacy,
yet I see you burn the soul of someone new.

Your cluttered mind has revoked individuality,
the delight I once held has turned to ashes.

Chaotic screeching of a disorganized person,
sending a blaze to catch others alight!

A firestorm of undisciplined immaturity,
embers scatter my deep affection.

My dear Ram, what have you done?
Why has everyone else caught fire?

Sometimes a small spark is all that's needed to reignite the flames of self again; You are finally free, my dear.

The pins and needles flowering my daydreams,
leave me wondering if I'll ever kiss you.
After all this time you've been loved by my mind,
I'd do it all over again, a million times.

Complex past lives can fit like a puzzle,
but your desire for suffering came in with a chainsaw.
Lives can be truthful and forever a memory-filled mind,
but your lack of forgiveness, leaves me invalidated.

I just want to let it all fade in the wind,
of course I'll take consequences, but you just won't forget,
to remind me, to stab me as each day passes on,
I just want to let it all fade and be gone.

Perish my thoughts, re-create some kind of lie,
because so many years were lost because of your sick minds.
You chose to fracture the soul of a child,
to have her grow up picking pieces up, begging for a reminder,
as to why she should live on, as each day grows harder.

Is it so hard to forget about me? As I'm already left alone.
Is it so hard to let me be, just let me go.
The more you hold onto me, it suffocates me more,
I understand I wasn't great, but you're killing my soul.

I could fight mountains, earthquakes and stop tropical storms too,
no matter what amount of work I put in, it's worthless to you.
I don't know what else to say, what's the point of talking too,
when you erase each word I say to fabricate something new.

I'm done with all this suffering, I'm done with all this pain,
I've tried 300 times to just start over again,
won't you let me just grow, I don't want to hear my name.
Because of you, I started to hate every single one of my veins.

Frustration turns to tears, I can't deal with this again, it's pathetic,
it's petty and I'm getting exhausted of your games.
If I were to start over, to live my life again,
I wouldn't waste a breath on you, I'd walk the other way.

I thought,
This is everything,
I've ever,
Wanted for us.

So now, I ask myself,
Why you don't...
Want us to stay.