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 May 2016 Leila Valencia
I fell once
Straight through the ground
I cratered the world with my impact
Past caves of darkness littered with gemstones
My hands could never hold
I was falling
Falling so hard that my body was breaking
And my mind was finding only new pits of despair
Down forever into the realms where demons claim to own
My home a firey tomb
And so I fell
What I thought to be eternal descent
My inertia to lead me to the depths of hell
And I thought I would stay there
Maybe forever
But still I fell
And kept falling onwards
My plummet of such immense proportion
That I fell straight through the world
To come out on the other side

And I was alright
they make goodbyes
sound easy
when they're at your door
late at night
and they scream your
name like a warning
from the bottom
of the staircase
you leave them,
until apologies make
your tongue as raw as
those nameless boys
the one's with
smoky breath,
they write your name
to the skies
constellate it to their
forefingers and cross it
over their forehead
like a baptism
those boys with hands
that eat like worms
at the dying heart
of your feelings
no, they don't love you
only death can
love you,
nameless girl
with the
countless faces.
© copyright
 Apr 2016 Leila Valencia
I thought
I could be someone.
I thought the world would open
up it's arms and allow the low
and broken
a home
in which to calm.
I was wrong.
Whispered dreams seem to shatter
on the wind.
A breeze of hope
whisked away the things I know
replacing them with
spinning tears.
No more near-sighted dreams.
A hurricane of plans
span it's last gust.
Leaving our future,
tumbling thickly
as dust.
Yay, pessimism. Life's been getting me down lately.
 Apr 2016 Leila Valencia
 Apr 2016 Leila Valencia
A creature of the night
gazed down upon the world,
stricken by the sights,
aghast at all the pain.
A leap,
a scratch,
a screech,
a flap
membranous wings unfurled,
a flight upon the clouds once more,
is all that could remain.
'No need for me', for easily
fears had reached their peak,
a relic of
a bygone age
when cellar doors would creak.
'Man can make his own pain,
the need for I no more,
below the glen, I'll go again,
like we have once before.
But come a time,
when mankind,
can with themselves peace keep,
from out our dusky homes we'll crawl,
and chaos we will reap.'
How can you not see that you get to choose?
What- too drained by the never-ending news feed, too blinded by the electronic glare, too mired to glance above the stumbling blocks strewn across the way?
Your internal and external worlds aren’t meant to be made of only the material.
Consumption and awareness are not two of the same.

You pause before you lie to yourself.
“I’m done caring. I’ve cared too much.”
It wouldn’t hurt if you were done. The issue isn’t of too much, but of what.
You’ve invested yourself in a delusion, breeding only empty rewards.
Look beyond.

The color display of bent light in a raindrop, the warmth of touch passing between you and the one at your side, the nothing to something infinity of our universe-
It’s all breathtaking, it’s all beautiful, it’s all heart-rending, it’s all-consuming.
It’s all connected to, from you.

No one will ever again experience the world as you.
Life’s not about figuring out who you want to be.
It’s just about
Every death
I have felt, or known,
In silence, i mourn,
Within my breath...

No words come upfront
Just thoughts, preponderant...

I'd feel the freezing cold of an empty space
Feel the absence...clearly imagine a lost face
No smiles, spanning from cheek to cheek
Eyes, seek answers...
suddenly, I'm there by the shallow water of the creek
While some nearby creatures quietly chirp...and squeak
While I......... I could not even speak...

Is realizing...and accepting
At the right time, they turn brown, the weeds...and reeds,
But, under the water...waiting, growing...are their seeds
Brown ferns...are almost detached from a mossy concrete wall
With a strong current, and wind, they'd be carried...ready to fall

The driftwood lying by the always wet, but petrified
Brown fallen leaves, on the green more hold...crisp and dried,
The dead bark of a pieces...are crumbling...
Merging with the wet a process of fertilizing
Deep down under ....a fresh spark of life is starting.
All these, remind,
Life and death stand side by side,
That in the midst of death-
Something new is birthed...
When faced with death,
there is always someone's living breath
And, as long as the heart wills to beat
Then, life.....will still exist.

Hundreds, or a thousand times,  
We all have died
In the high and low of life's tides,

We remember
Those who have left
Those who have survived..are still around
We think of those who are next to leave,
Waiting for their chests' final heave

---And then, we think of ourselves---

Worry not of our own time
Make each of our remaining days
Be golden, beaming, and bright
With good deeds, and straight pathways

The earth is a moving circle
It makes a it spins
We try to live outwards....and then, within
Any way we live is an endless cycle.


Copyright March 23, 2016
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
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