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Kaiden Lewis Nov 2024
"You're so talented"
Until they find out it's because writing is the only way to keep me from losing sanity

"You're so mature"
Until they find out it's because i was forced to grow up way too fast

"You're so responsible"
Until they find out i ran away at 13

"You're such a good friend"
Until they find out i have a different personality for each one of them

"You're so helpful"
Until they find out that no matter what i do, i can't say no

"You're such a good Christian"
Until they find out i'm gay

"You're such a pretty girl"
Until they find out i'm not even a girl

"You're such a good brother"
Until they find out i almost killed mine

"You're so strong"
Until they find out i almost gave up
They love you until they find out something about you that they hate
  Nov 2024 Kaiden Lewis
Dr Peter Lim
Some are OK
       some are not OK
       most seem to be half-way
Kaiden Lewis Nov 2024
If you see this,
Maybe at least pay attention this time?

To the words and how they're written
If you even care.
Reader,
Enlighten me, what would change if i
Died?
look

C
L
O
S
E
L
Y
Kaiden Lewis Nov 2024
Being the abused child is
Flinching at everything
Not knowing how it feels to be cared for
Blaming yourself
Thinking their love is a lie
Maladaptive daydreaming
Addictions
Being over-compliant
Not being able to say no
Mysic loud enough to silence your mind
and the pretty silver lines engraved on your skin

It's not fair
i just wanted a normal life
Abuse is not that big of a deal, or is it?
Kaiden Lewis Nov 2024
Is writing a gift,
Or is it a curse?
I could be a doctor, a lawyer, a nurse,
But i chose to be a disgrace instead.

I sit in my room, writing nonsense
That no one's ever gonna read.
Random words, without any context
Among other plants, a simple ****

A normal person sees this as a waste of time,
Takes away my notebook
Little did they know, it was the only thing keeping my sanity intact.
Wrote this at like 2am..
  Nov 2024 Kaiden Lewis
Snow red fox
Sitting in the dark dark room,
in the corner of my mind,
in the corner of the room where the shadows loom.

The rivers of salty water flow down the river styx that guides me thru the end.
The boat is floating and flowing with screams of the unfortunate and unforgiving as the death rows thru the gates of the end.
But the end is never truly the end.

Shadow people twist their dark grins in forms that hurts,
the death is hanging over my shoulder whispering,
urging me to torment my broken mind until it falls and becomes theirs.

Theirs, theirs like a thing or a toy or like a match that isn’t destroyed.

From dust we come to dust we go, what’s the point of life, if we must die?
Reflection over the life of an individual and the fascination over afterlife
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