I've become so custom to the side effects of depression, that they don't even seem abnormal anymore.
Never being able to sleep, but always being tired.
Oh that's no big deal, i'll just blame it on the coffee.
Not having enough energy to complete even the simplest of tasks.
But that's okay, you're just a lazy kid.
Constantly feeling like you're never good enough, that nobody even likes you or wants you around.
Oh stop it, don't be so clueless. That's just common teenage emotions.
Having to talk yourself into getting out of bed in the morning, because you would rather be dead than face the rest of the day.
Oh just get over yourself, you're being too dramatic, is what they'll say.
But little do they know, none of this is normal.
No one should have to wake up everyday, wishing that yesterday would've be their last.
How common do you think it is, to wish every single breath you take would be your last?
None of this is common, not in the slightest bit.
Can you please tell me why anyone would want to be like this?
People let you believe that depression is just a phase; something you can snap out of at any given day
But in reality, you can't; it is a life long disease that takes years to overcome.
And just like any disease, if it doesn't get treated, millions of people can, and will, die from it.

Poetry is about self expression
If people make fun of you for that, then what is left?
Without self expression, you'd have a lot more dead teens.
Bottling up their emotions because they cant let anyone see.
They'll keep everything inside until its too much to handle
Then they'll turn to self harm as a way to release it.
But they can't let anyone see, because then they're just asking for attention.
I know this all too well, ive been in their shoes, i know exactly what it leads to.
You wake up everyday wishing you were dead
But can't end your life because that takes too much effort.
I got out alive tho, because i found a healthy habit.
I'd take the pen and pour out my emotions.
Honestly i can say that i would probably be dead,
If i hadn't picked up the pen the day that i did.
So just know it gets better, you just have to find your healthy habit.
And that's the good thing about poetry, because no one ever judges you for it.
We've all had a past and done things we wish we hadn't
But that makes the best poets,
'Cause they write out what you feel because they know from experience.

I want to write a happy poem
I truly do

But when I write
I let it pour straight
From my soul
To the paper

And happiness
You see,
Is something
My soul doesn't
Even remember

I want to write a happy poem
Honest

I've tried
And tried
But every time
They've ended up
In the trash

I want to write a happy poem
I really do

But apparently,
You need to be happy
To share
Happiness

Which means
All I can spread
Is sadness

Please,
Remind me;

What does joy feel like?
Why is it so desired?
Does it even exist?

Remind me;

What does content sleep feel like?
Do you dream?
Can you remember anything?

Remind me;

What does peace feel like?
Does it ever change?
Is it really that good?

Remind me;

What does innocence feel like?
Do you care about things still?
Are there still some who feel it?

I'll remind you;
Not knowing these
*****

there are too many times when i feel alone.
i could be in a room surrounded by people
and not know a single one or rather
pretend i don’t know a single one
i worry about being a bother
am i annoying you yet sorry i’ll
stop
i’m lonely i’m alone i’m so sorry i’m alone i’mlonelyi’malonei’msosorryi’m–
okay. hi. who are you?
you are lonely too?
goodbye. see you soon.