And with tears rolling down her blotchy red cheek,
she lies down in the middle of the battlefield, now so weak –
so tired of saving herself from the demons that haunt every fibre of her being,
she decides that welcoming her demise would be most freeing.

الصّراحة أهم شي بين رجّال و مرأة..."
إذا أنا بدّي روح إحكي مع مرأة، دغري من الأوّل رح خبّرها عن طبيعة علاقتنا
ّو هيّي بالنّهاية إنسانة حرّة، فيها تقبل معي و تضلّ و فيها ترفض و تفل
ما بفهم كيف الواحد بْيِقدر يجرَح غيرو
أنا كنت مغروم بوحدة و ضلّينا ۸ سنين سوا
كان ماشي حالنا
كنّا مبسوطين
كانت كل شهر توعدني إنّو هل شهر رح نتجوَّز
و أنا كنت إنطرها
في نهار بدقّلها كذا مرّة و ما بت رِد، ف بدِقّ لأهلها و بت رِد إمها و بت قلّي إنها سافرت لعَند إخواتها
ما صدّقت بل أوّل و كتير كتير اتدايقت
هل إنسانة كانت تنام عندي أكتر من ما كانت تنام عند أهلها
و حِبْلت مني مرتين و ضلّيت حدها لما رَوّحت
"ما عرفت ليه عملت هيك

"رجعت حكيت معها شي؟"

"لأ. أبداً. يمكن تجَوّزت و جابت ولاد. ليش لأ؟ كنت حلوة"

"ما دقّتلك؟"

"لأ. من وقتها ما عدت عرفت عنها شي"

"إدّي كان عمرك؟"

طّلّع فيّي بالمراية هيك و ابتسم ب لحيتو البيضا

"مغرومي بواحد أكبر منك؟"

اتضحّكت

"لأ"

"لكان ليه عم بتسأليني؟"

"ما رح تقلّي؟"

"لأ"

"ليه لأ؟"

"بلاها أحسن. يلا بنتي، أنا بدّي إفرق يمين من هون. بدّك تنزلي هون، مذبوط؟"

"إيه"

وقّف، بَرَم و طّلّع فيّي ابتسملي. ابتسمتله

"يعطيك العافية عَم"

"انتبهي ع حالك يا بنتي"



"... Honesty is the most important thing between a man and a woman
If I were ever to meet a woman, I would tell her straight ahead about the nature of our relationship
I don't understand why would people feel the need to hurt each other
I was once in love with a woman, we were together for 8 years
Were were doing well
We were happy
Every month she would promise to marry me
And I would wait for her
One day, I call her several times in the morning - no answer
I call her parents and listen to her mother telling me she left the country to live with her brothers
I didn't believe her at first and I felt a pain in my chest
This woman slept at my place more than she did in her own
She got pregnant twice from me and I was always next to her during the abortion
I don't understand why she did so"

"Did you ever get back in touch with her?"

"No. Never. She's probably married and has kids. Why not? she was a beautiful woman."

"Did she ever call you?"

"No. I know nothing about her since."

"How old were you?"

He looks at me through his rear mirror and smiles through his white beard.

"Are you in love with an older man?

I laugh.

"No."

"Then why are you asking me?"

"You won't tell me?

"No."

"Why not?"

"It's better this way. I gotta make a right turn now, young lady, and you wanted to get here right?"

"Yes."

He stops the car, turns around and looks at me. He smiles. I smile back.

"Thank you, sir, have a good day."

"Take care of yourself, young lady."




لين اا -
- LynnAA

دخلَك؟
هل وردة اللّي كنّا حاملينا سوا بنصّ البحر، وَينا؟ شو صار فيها؟
فِلْتِت من إيدَيْنا و عم بجرّب إتذكّر كيف
قَوْلَك ماتت؟ غِرقت؟ أو بَركي فاشت ع سطح المَي و وصلت لحالها ع الشَّط...؟
عم بقول لحالي إنّو بركي ما سَقَيناها مزبوط، أو بركي خلّيْناها  بالشّمس لوقت طويل
زعِلت عليها، كانت جامعِتنا أنا و إنت، و هيّي الوحيدة اللّي خلّصتنا من العواصف، بتتذكّر؟
...كانت لتخلّصنا، تجبرنا نحملها سوا و نضطر نحط إيدينا ببعض
يمكن ميِّة الملح ما لايمتها و تعبت من كِترِت العواصف
و يمكن أصلاً كان البحرعم ب هوج ت يقِلنا إنّو مَيْتو ما بت لايمنا
وهل الوردة فهمت قبلنا و تركتنا نفهم لحالنا
بس يمكن أنا و إنت ما في غير مَيْة البحر بتلايِمنا



You know?
That flower we were holding together in the middle of the sea, where is she? What happened to her?
She got away from our grip and I'm trying to remember how
You think she died? Or drowned? Probably she floated on the surface and landed alone on the shore...?
I'm telling myself that maybe we didn't water her as we should have or maybe we exposed her too much to the sun
It saddens me, she held us together, you and I, she was the only one to save us from the storms, remember?
She used to make us hold her together and intertwine our hands, that's how she saved us...
Perhaps the salted water didn't do her well and perhaps also she got tired of the abundance of the storms
And probably the sea kept on raging with high tides, trying to tell us that we don't belong to its water
And that flower understood before us and left us to realize this on our own
But maybe, nothing fits you and I better than the water of the sea



لين اا -
- LynnAA