No more a man, no less a boy.
I came home today.
I am anchored here, a rusted chain i can't take off.
The further i walk, the tighter the heavy brown collar grips my throat.
It pains me to be away.
It hurts me to stay.
No more alive, no less deceased.
I stayed home today.
New scratches line my back as the rough metal of my leash grazes back and forth across my shoulders through the day.
It's cold inside.
The sun struggles to find me back behind these walls.
No more satisfied, no less disappointed.
I stayed in bed today.
Wrapped in a duvet ive never not had.
Familiar, comfortable, unpleasant.
No more honest, no less a liar.
I told myself id go out today,
But as i approached the door my neck got heavy, hard to breath, and the chain links cut my back.
It hurts to stay, too painful to leave.
I grovel at my own feet.
To a man ive know my whole life.
The man who lives at home.
No more at peace, no less disturbed.
Today i decided to stay a while.
If i left id only be back,
I always,
Come
Back.
I dropped the anchor, i linked the chain.
I know i secretly like it here.
It hurts to stay, too painful to leave.
Today i stayed at home.
Today i stayed at home.
Today i stayed at home.
Today i stayed at home.
Today i stayed at home.
Today i stayed at home.
Depression becomes Stockholm syndrome, imprisoned and in love with your sadness.