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 Feb 2015 jack of spades
Drifter
PDA
 Feb 2015 jack of spades
Drifter
PDA
I noticed how freaked out they got
when that couple kissed in sight
or smiled just a little too wide
into each others’ adoring eyes
and it felt like compressed air
too many soggy molecules
packed into fleeting cold stares
because god forbid you be happy
and *you don’t get to have love
when I can barely sleep at night
because my silly ******* job
keeps me from what I really want
and I am always the depressed wolf
who gave up on finding meaning
from this **** storm we call life
so please, “get a ******* room”
you stupid storybook happy people
I don’t want you to remind me
that I used to want to care
or that my thoughts used to have
resemblance of a child’s wish list
just get out of our deteriorating lives
don’t ******* come here again
with your stupid storybook ****.
Just because you're not happy, doesn't mean others don't get to be. Also, why are you calling the most natural thing gross? What.
Uncertainty fills the air
And suddenly I'm not so sure.
Nostalgia begins to decay
But why?
Heavy, heavier...
I inhale and sigh with, what, exasperation?
Creation?
These are all mere distractions
To prevent myself from colliding
With myself,
With how I feel.
Emotional trauma, Part I -
Coming soon to a childhood near you!
We laugh it off
But it does not leave us.
Nothing can leave us
As easily as you walked away
That night.
I will not forget what I saw.
Engraved in my brain
Causing me to crumble
Tumble, tumble...
**Crash.
I’m sorry but I’m actually going to begin reevaluating my life. I need to buckle down, and just get things straight for once. I can’t continue wasting my time with pointless, mindless things. I need substance. I am going to improve academically and just **** all social insecurities. I’ll be out of this town in about a year, I can handle a year of solitude. I find it easier that way, anyways. So, I’m sorry for being a ****** person. But I’m not going to apologize for anything anymore, because if you don’t like me, don’t like my concern, don’t like my emotions, and most certainly don’t like the person I’ve become, then I don’t think you are worthy of another apology.
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