moving past the foliage
I smack back
the tangled brush
a strange truth revealed
my emotions in a rush
Here I am
in this hell-hatched bind
braced against the winds
grasping at shards
           of the Divine
for they're inside me,
all those pieces
jagged glass and soft meringue
my innards humming
shades of the blues
in offbeat notes of pain
and I know that deep within
between my earthly
beats of heart
resides a light that's
only mine
that slices through
this drape of dark

It's a heavy nightcloak breaking
as I reach out from
                     the abyss
praying for the comfort
of my soul's
bright morning
                kiss

I had been dreaming
about eating bruised peaches
that grew from a tree
by the river, its water
thick and sweet as sap.

I thought I saw an old woman
shaking her dustmop,
but it was only the moon
and stardust in the dark
that never stops.

In the fields
there was something barren
like a journey
and echoes of salt
sprinkling on a table
with food laid out for a wake.

The fog from the dream
by the river was smothering;
I was suffocating lying there
where it is said a young mother
once walked into the water
with the pockets of her dress
stuffed full of smooth rocks.

I woke when I heard
shouting that tore out the light
as night came flying by
like a bird dressed for a feast
wearing his finest black feathers.

Fear
So complete and so overwhelming;
Nothing else can be felt.

The room that surrounds me is too small
The white washed walls closing in
It is a cave from which I cannot see the mouth.
The darkness is engulfing me fast
The light is disappearing fast
It is a whirlwind of shadows and fading voices
The reality is blurring, in its place
A distorted nightmare stitches itself
Like black, thick treacle it slowly slides into my ear drum
A wild hyena laugh
It’s here.

The air is painfully thin.
Every withering gasp becomes shallower
My lungs are shrinking
They are red balloons
Punctured by sharp, shining needles
Deflating, they push out the oxygen
Drawing in the black charcoal
My chest feels so heavy
The smoke suddenly solidifying
I can’t breathe.

I am trapped.
Isolated and alone
My body a steel prison
I lie helplessly on its foreign, metallic floor
The cold cuts into me
My bones freezing over slowly,
I can’t move.

The ice is a barrier between me and the outside
Carving the figures into unfamiliar shapes
I do not know this place
I am a child lost in a funfair.
The world clumsily stumbles in front of me
A million joyous colours and noises bleeding together
Forming one screaming siren
It yells “PANIC, PANIC, PANIC”
A rhythmic repeating chant
Blaring and bright
I’m drowning in its wails.

My body jitters like an old wood coaster
Jerking, swaying under a heavy weight
I try to stop it but it is out of my control now
The cart has left the station

The hyena laugh again trickles into my ears
Growing louder and louder
It morphs into a crazed clowns cackle
Howling at my failed attempts
My palms start to shake,
They cling to my arms as I rock back and forth
Trying desperately to make it stop
Why won’t it stop?
Why won’t it end?

My heart starts to speed
Beating so fast, it hammers against my glass ribs
It is deafening.
Like footsteps pounding the pavement
Running crazily to try escape
Terrified of the monster cowering over its shoulder
Painted face, disguised, its screeches surround me.
I trip and fall, knees grazing and legs shaking
I cry like a little girl to her mother
“Make it stop”, I whimper.
The monster towers over me.

From aside me, an arm leans into my cave.
It whips off the monsters mask.
Nothing is there.

You are Art,
Moulded with grace
From mud and clay,
Nourished with an
unfathomable mind,
A creation so divine.
Indeed, created to create.