The last words we shared are still saved on my phone
We were miles apart, far from the eyes but close at heart
But now we are in a different time zone

I’m lost in the night and you’re bathing in sunlight
I can hear your breath but you’re oblivious to my death

All you know is success, you don’t worry
What could be the aftermath, if you’re in the right path

And I’m ashamed of my being, I’m not my usual self but I’m trying

I blame myself but if there’s one thing that makes me angry

I’ve always been there for you and you gave up on me so easily

I’ve spent a lot of time craving for someone. I wanted a presence to reassure me when I fell asleep. I wanted eyes that said « you’re beautiful ». I wanted a smile every time I felt happy and sometimes when I felt sad too. I wanted hands to wipe my tears when I’m done crying. I wanted a voice to tell me « I love you » and « I believe in you ».
I need someone that will care and take care of me unconditionally. I want someone who will love me now and forever.

And I realised that I’ll find that someone in no one else but me.

I used to hate falling asleep because I was scared of the monster under my bed,
Now I wake up anxious because the monsters are inside my head.

Absent-mindedly gazing at the white ceiling
More questions than answers laying up
and the blank space hopelessly looking back

Peeking through the window
a beam of light meets your eye
Its warmth bringing back up

the gold dust glittering, swirling, dancing
that makes the world go round and round
the clock, the Sun and the bend