I want to rip my name
              out of your throat  
You are not allowed
                  to speak it anymore.

I’m scared as f*ck
to want you.

But here
I am,

Still wanting you
anyway.

most people see me as
a happy person because
i laugh easily,
i smile a lot,
i joke a lot.

but deep down
in my heart,
i am fragile,
i can get hurt easily,
but i choose to not
show it to the world.

instead of being sad,
i choose to laugh to cover it.
maybe you can call me
"the queen of the mask"

by this,
you can tell
that most of the time
when I'm laughing,
I'm not really laughing,
i was trying so hard to hide
my sadness.

The poet lives two lives.
One on the outside,
And one in their mind.

When you look in their eyes
You could see an abyss.

If you looked long enough
You could sink into it.

But most people don’t see it.

Take the time to read the words, though,
And you would know for sure.

The poet lives in two different worlds.

Does he still love her?

She spent countless times daydreaming of them together,
Even at nights, he appears on her dreams,
Maybe it's a terrible habit to keep on holding on to their memories,
But **** was she terrified,
And oh was he madly in love... or used to.

So she asked him if he still loves her,
She closed her eyes and
My God, she was hoping...

Silent stares came and,
She  took a sharp breath and whispered,
"Spare me what you think,
and just tell me a lie".