Finley in Despair: Favorites

Nov 2016 Finley in Despair

Malerie Serra

When it tickles in your toes
unable to keep a straight face
cheek to cheek a grin of white teeth
warm inside feelings of rosy pink
that moment when everything is right
no matter the height or lousy sight
when theres never a fight
that can break the bright in spite of love taking a flight

Oct 2016 Finley in Despair

It was you.

Oct 2016 Finley in Despair

Paige Sawyer

It was you.

I'm not sure where I went wrong.
One day we were best friends,
The next we were not.
What happened?

It was you who carried me home,
when I could not walk.
It was you who made me laugh,
when I could not smile.
It was you who stood up for me,
when I could not talk.

It was you who ****** me,
knowing I was drunk.
It was you who took advantage of me,
knowing I was in a relationship.
It was you who did not stop,
knowing I had asked you to.

You are the reason for,
the tears rolling down my face.
You are the reason for,
the cuts and scars on my arms.
You are the reason for,
all of my anxiety and trust issues.

I should hate you for all of this,
But I don't...

Friends end sad

Oct 2016 Finley in Despair

i've never told anyone this before

Oct 2016 Finley in Despair

Lucid

i've never told anyone this before

"She says, 'It's only in my head.'
She says, 'Shh, I know it's only in my head."

I was baptized when I was four years old
except it didn't turn out like most baptisms do.
It was a backwards baptism,
my childish innocence was left floating in the bath water like dead skin
and I stepped out bathed in sin.
Reborn in sin.
Seeds of sin
planted into my growing body
by the man with the face like Jesus.
"**** on it like a lollipop", he said
trying to appeal to the childish innocence
that he unknowingly stole
just moments before.

I did as he said
obedient child that I was.
I didn't know the difference then
like I do now
but the difference doesn't even matter anymore.
When you plant corrupted seeds
you grow a corrupted tree.

Now I wake up with blood under my fingernails
from trying to shed the hate
branded into my skin.
Now I'm constantly fighting a civil war
between the devil and god
raging inside of me.
Now I feel guilty for who I have become
because I never knew how innocence felt.
Now my poisoned mind only knows to yield
to the sinful whispers
that float inside my head
whenever I close my eyes.

I may have lost my innocence
but I guess
I didn't lose my obedience.

"But the ******* the car in the parking lot
says, 'Man, you should try to take a shot.
Can't you see my walls are crumbling?'
Then she looks up at the building
says she's thinking of jumping
says she's tired of life.
She must be tired of something."

We talk just like lions
but we sacrifice like lambs
'Round here
she's slipping through my hands

#love #heartbreak #sad #depression #illness #depressed #demons #are #mental #inside

Oct 2016 Finley in Despair

Her

Oct 2016 Finley in Despair

Styles

Her

She lives somewhere within me;
      deeper than love,
      stronger than pain,
      She is me.
      Spirits intwhine,
      body and soul,
      on my mind.
      Us; we will be.

#love #poem #poetry #poet #passion #happy #***