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faith autumn Oct 2018
I used to think that we were ******
By distance.
I still do, but now
I can't help but think about
How incredibly lucky I am
To have someone in my life
That is so worth missing,
So worth loving.
How fortunate I am
To have someone
To wait for.
faith autumn Aug 2018
I'm not home right now,
But I'll call you back as soon as I can.
(Well, technically, I am home
If you define a home
By four sides,
Windows,
Doors,
And rooms.
But I consider her to be my home,
My place of comfort,
And I cannot be at home
Until we are reunited.)
At the tone, please record your message.
faith autumn Nov 2018
I crawl into bed every night
Unaccompanied.
And even though
You're hundreds of miles away
And several weeks are keeping us apart
And I am unaccompanied,
I always stay to one side of the bed
Because I always leave
A space for you.
faith autumn Sep 2018
I drove down the back road last night
For the first time since you've been away.
It was dark
Just how was the last time we drove down it,
But this time,
You weren't there with me.
I can't wait for the nights
When I can drive down it again
With your fingers interlaced in mine.
I can't wait for the nights
I have to fight speeding home
Because it took too long to say goodbye.
faith autumn Oct 2018
I am sick and tired of
Living in a world where
I censor my own thoughts
Subconsciously
Because I have been taught
To suppress
Because I have been taught
To put off what is bothering me
Until it piles on top of
A ticking time bomb
That is destined to explode
At any time
Without warning.
I am sick and tired of
Having so many thoughts Overwhelming my brain
And not being able to put them
Into words.
I am sick and tired
Of being so afraid to speak my mind
That I make it impossible.
Aren't you?
faith autumn Aug 2018
during the darkest of nights
when your eyelashes are wet from tears
and your heart is heavy in your chest,
i hope you can find comfort
i hope you can find peace
i hope that you may get
a good night's sleep
faith autumn Sep 2018
I swear I saw
Your face in the stars
Illuminating my world
In the darkness of the night,
A celestial presence upon me.
I thought maybe the heavens
Had taken you back
But as you pulled me closer to you
I was brought back to ground
On Earth,
In the presence of an Angel.
faith autumn Oct 2018
Don't write to please
Anyone
Except yourself
Because your words are meant for
You:
Your release
Your comfort,
Your healing;
Don't write to please
Anyone
Except yourself
Because you are the one
Who truly needs it.
faith autumn Sep 2018
All I want is for you
To stop.
Stop acting like nothing happened;
You and I both know
You only came back to me
Because it was convenient.
And now you're like a ghost;
When I speak to you
It haunts me because
It's like you're not really there.
You're only a memory
Of what used to be.
I can't decide what's more painful:
The fact that everything we
Used to have,
Used to know,
Has vanished,
Or the fact that
We never really needed each other
In the first place.
faith autumn Aug 2018
To the best thing that's ever happened to me:
My mother told me that any serious relationship at my age isn't healthy.
And despite what I've experienced in my past,
I couldn't disagree more
When it comes to you.
Until my mother said that,
I couldn't find the words that could describe how you make me feel.
But now I know.
I know that
No matter if you're by my side
or out pursuing your greatness in the mountains,
Your smile reflects the light in my life that I've been yearning for,
Your words rekindle the warmth inside of my aching heart, and
Your lips revitalize my body every time they meet mine.
I have never felt healthier.
I have never felt more alive.
faith autumn Oct 2018
I am thinking of you
As I lie in bed.
I think of you all day
But when it is dark
And I am alone
In my bed
Everything about you
Entices my brain
And I can't help but think about
How much I miss you
How much I love you
And how much
I wish you were here
Lying in bed
Next to me.
faith autumn Oct 2018
I never forgot
How nice it feels
To kiss you,
But I did forget
How agonizing it is
To let you go.
faith autumn Dec 2018
How wonderful it is
To have someone here
To go to the library with
faith autumn Sep 2018
I'm at a loss of words,
And this time
It's not for the usual reasoning
That you astonish me
To a point of speechlessness.
This time it's because
I miss you
And I'm struggling to speak to you
Without those three words
Tumbling out of my mouth.
faith autumn Nov 2018
The "deeper issue" is
No matter how many times
I correct you
Or how many times I tell you
How much she means to me,
You still choose to refer to her
As my friend.
faith autumn Sep 2018
Dear beautiful,
There's something about
The way you write my name
And how you wrote to me
In such a way that
I could hear your voice
Through the paper.
There's something about
The way you describe how
You can't seem to get me off of your mind;
Trust me,
I know the feeling.
Sincerely,
Yours
P.S.,
I love you too.
faith autumn Oct 2018
You always say that
You got a second chance, but
I'm the lucky one.
faith autumn Oct 2018
Nothing is more relieving
Than being able to look you
In the eye
With my shoulders back
And my head held high.
Today
I did not tremble
When you walked through the door,
And in that moment I knew
You no longer have power over me.
You no longer have the power
To beat me down
Or make me feel inferior
Or make me feel worthless.
I am not afraid of you.
You may have won the Battles,
But I have won the War.
faith autumn Aug 2018
each time i glance in the mirror
i am shocked
that there does not appear to be
a gaping hole in my chest.
i cannot see it
but i can feel it
because my heart
no longer resides in my body.
it is where it belongs,
with the light of my life.
she
is three hundred sixty-five miles away
faith autumn Aug 2018
I watched her through my glass door and my watery eyes
As she walked away from my porch
And got into her truck,
As she sweetly yet sadly smiled and waved
Before backing out of my driveway
Onto the dimly-lit night road.
I could still feel the soft kiss upon my lips she left me with;
I could still hear her voice in the truck singing some song about loving me until her dying day;
I could still see her eyes:
A sea of love;
An ocean of reassurance.
My love, everything will be okay.
I'll see you again when the colors change.
faith autumn Oct 2018
The colors are changing
But they are not changing
Fast enough.
Not fast enough
To satisfy my will to hold you
Not fast enough
To satisfy my urge to kiss you
Not fast enough;
And I think that the
Time
Will
Drag
Until I see you standing in front of me.
faith autumn Nov 2018
It's not because
I don't have anything to say;
It's because
I cannot find the proper way
To say it.

— The End —