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  Oct 4 Daniel Cowick
Anjali
Sometimes,
I just wanna leave
everything and everyone
Just to see who'll find me
In the crowd of thousands
Will ever someone actually
be bothered about my absence
I wanna sit back and watch

-   SASR
She's shaking.
Unstable.
For the taking.
Swallowed in fog.
Connection is lost.
She's cut off
From herself.
She's cut off.
Can't get out.
There is no where but here.

"Disappear. Disappear."
She whispers.

"I am here. I am here."
She answers.

"Tell me." He says,
"Tell me all that you dread."

And her fears spoke louder
Than anything ever said.
Inspired from learning about polyvagal theory and the feeling of being "stuck" in the sympathetic state (fight/flight/freeze) or dorsal (collapse). Speaking about where youre at can help you bring back ventral state to the foreground, the beneficial state, the ability to have connectedness at ease.
  Sep 21 Daniel Cowick
Caden
close your eyes babe
what do you see?
a starry night or a porcelain sky?
is it the shade of navy you love?
i closed my eyes and i saw the world grabbing me gently, pulling me tight and close,
while it whispers sweet nothing in my ear
i envision a love that is endless,
a heart so large that it overflows,
and a passion that even fruits envy.
so tell me darling,
have you a dream to sell me?
  Sep 14 Daniel Cowick
kaela
i need a hug,
not a false side one.
a really long one.
one in which i just disappear from the world.

nothing else will matter.
not the fact that me and you
have both moved on and found someone new.
i need one so tight
that i can feel my bones being crushed and pressured
until they s h a t t e r .

until
i
see
nothing
but
a
black
screen.

because all of what i've seen
is pain and hurt.
people fall and are pushed to
instantly get back up and brush off the dirt.

let's hug.
until
we
both
disappear.
  Sep 9 Daniel Cowick
N
A drunken god has
spoke you into existence
A stolen diary that told you,
it’s a sin to return this body
even if its weak bones
couldn’t carry the weight
of your heavy heart

I know I can speak myself out of it
With a blade in my hand
standing on the edge of the stage,
I’ll wait for the Almighty to sober up
and watch me steal his role

After twenty years of rehearsal
I’ll play god,
lights will go off,
and curtains will close

Your followers will clap in awe
at my convincing performance

As I bow before them
As I fall before you
This is merely satire.
“Are you okay?”,
my wife asks
when I cough.

“No. I’m fine.
Yes. I’m not”,
I respond,

stumping her
in the poetic irony
of words that

encompass the
yes and no
and the in between.

She flips the finger
at me and I return
the bird to the nest.

We go back to our life
and our tablets,
the drip, drip of my chemo
and I wonder about okay.

“No.  You’re fine.
Yes. You’re not.”,
the bag stares in response.
Pain is inevitable,
Suffering is optional.
The crossroads of success,
Is always constructional.

If we could become tress,
Solid and stoic, deep rooted
In Mother Earth's flesh;
We could stand firm
Through the tempest, unswayed.

But we are only humans.
Covered in darkness.
Hiding behind our fears,
Timidly withdrawing from
The ominous tempest.

So, embrace the fury,
The daunting gales that
Once were scary.
After all, you can't
Stop the waves,
But you can learn to surf.

And even if you sank,
Deeper into the void,
At least you'll drown
Knowing there was
Beauty In The Struggle.
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