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I feel like a lot of relationships take the next step, when all it takes is one word, and the both of us are smiling or laughing.
I've got a lot of inside jokes with my family here on campus.
It's great.
Love hides like a tiny insect,
Sometimes it flies analogously,
Then it finds a corner, just perfect,
For it to sit down and ponder,
Over all the people heartlessly rushing hither, thither, yonder.
Their hearts are fragile like glass,
So small, so brittle.
Hopes, both large and little
Reside amidst jungles of desires.
Everything is such a beautifully perplexing chaos,
That Life stares blankly, and admires.
The Beauty
The Beast
The unyielding Duty
Of Being, at least.

Look at me rant ceaselessly,
As my heart pounds harder than my chest can take.
You come here and leave immediately,
And the illusion dissolves; is all this just fake?
How wonderful I feel,
No matter what I write.
The world will never give me a seal,
Whether wrong, or contemptuously right.
Music rushes into my ears, flooding my canal.
Words and words, I think and think, but nothing seems final.
Appropriate is what they appreciate.
Everything else is just another reason to depreciate.
You have taught me all the ways in which I am not great.
Yet show me how to stop, and your temples will cringe with fret,
With regret.
Sing unto my untamable spirit, tales of clipping wings,
Or the melody of how a ruffled feather sings,
And I will break it down for you,
All the nuances,
Of our last rendezvous.

Dare to look into my eyes.
Even if you find nothing but empty sighs.
I am not made for your poetry.
I am drained now, reduced to nothing but grocery.
My earth derailed from its dreams,
Crashes against mirrors, stiflingly decorated with cuts molded against seams.
Fabrics, Feelings and Fragrances, all laced up.
Pour me some of that whiskey.
I have no glass, just a small, pointless cup.
Why so serious?
you make me jittery
restless and blistery
you wrap me up,
warm but bitterly

you are my cup of coffee
His hands were callused and cracked
They were rough on my cheek
I had never been pulled in the way Clark Gable pulls them in
Like in all of those movies I had seen when I was a kid
The way I had always practiced
Back then my ringtone was the sound of bells chiming
More specifically the bells of Notre Dame
As his stubble grazed mine they rang out
He let go of my face, his untrimmed nails scratched my chin
I would weep for hours that night
Stare into the dark corners of my room
Trying to identify all of the shadows I used to think were scary
I knew now what scary really was
Scary was his hand on my rib cage
Scary was liking it
He never did call
I changed my ringtone to the whistle from Robin Hood
I was set up on a date by my best friend
She was kind
Her hands were soft and smelled like Love Spell by Victoria’s Secret
She had no stubble to graze mine
She pressed her lips on the scratch he left on my chin with his untrimmed fingernails
And I flinched
This too was scary
This too I liked
A collection of poems by me is available on Amazon
Where She Left Me - Michael DeVoe
 Mar 2017 Dillan Courtright
Kelly
I loved you
most
when I lost you

Loved you least,
when frustration got in my way,

Missing you now
Love you, always.
The Moon

I've lost track of the moon,
I was away for a month
In a cloudy place.
I've lost track of the moon.

The stars were in hiding too.
Sirius, where were you
my brilliant gem?
You, who was rising in the
early dawn sky as my
daughter was born.
I've lost track of the moon
It is a clear cold morning in Winter;
I woke with a cold's cough
the sky grows a shade dimmer
from blue skies to grey skies
and my fingers blister.

It is morning yet I feel hopeless
I wake with the day on my mind
in hopes that someone will notice
that today, I was someone,
I look for a way not to feel broken.

It sounds a little too desperate
to text "hey its my b-day"
so I make them guess it
"do you know what today is?"
but my spirits only lessen.

I roll back to bed till afternoon,
I cut the cake with wishes in mind,
I leave a slice like a crescent moon
in case someone suddenly notices
but I finish off that moon.

I cut the cake by myself
with candle-lit wishes
blowing each one by itself
I blow the last with a wish
that ends with the word "help?"

I message "sorry if I bothered you"
with hopes that the response is
"no you didn't" because the truth
is that I am always lonely
so a conversation rubs away the bruise.

I hang on every word I hear
hoping to feel closer to people
but my database of almost non-existent peers
don't make much for conversation
so I pretend I don't shed tears.

Night arrives, the day is at an end
it wasn't as pictured in my mind
nor was I surrounded by friends
but I watched a day of passing lights
and know that it's finally tomorrow again.

The one day I'm supposed to matter is over,
for the last twenty one years it's been the same,
and I hold a torch in my heart for the closure;
but every year I am alone in a dark room
slicing at a cake that was too big for myself
with wishes that asks questions all to well
like "can I have someone who cares about me,
please? Can you help?"
but I don't think-
Santa does birthday wishes, nor do falling stars,
and I think God only answers the big questions
so I am left guessing as to who I just sent
my silent candle-lit wishes to.
For the past 21 years, I have spent every single one of my birthday alone. I lie that I spend it in guts and glory, but truthfully I have spent them all alone.

(No today is not my birthday - this is just a reminder to myself that I have tomorrow, and day after tomorrow and so on.)
I live vividly without visibly having the ability to live willingly nor the versatility to fight your volatility. Unequivocally I believe in relativity but unofficially I use negativity as a means of self-sufficiency. Naturally I have a proclivity towards acting predictably when publicly judging turbidity. Additionally I hide in anonymity and indignantly ignore my epiphany of the asymmetry of unanimity. Shamefacedly I turn to your intricate dystrophy and observe the futility of my soliloquy. I can' find nobility in dying deliberately, but it shows efficiency in skimming humanity. Initially my hostility was untangible but it has suspiciously aquired solidity and is now intermittently sending signs of my eccentricity. My alkalinity is running low because surreptitiously the pungency has grown. I am undoubtedly peripheral to the society and irresistibly disposable in the industry of this idiosyncrasy.
You took away all the tools
to allow me to fix us

I'm sitting here with my hands tied behind my back
waiting for you to release them
So I can reach you.
So I can hold you.

So I can tell you how sorry I am.

Please release me.
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