I didn't cry. I couldn't.
I thought I was being strong. Crying isn't weakness though.
I thought I was doing it for the family. I wasn't helping nor hindering anyone.
I made myself ill out of pride. You were diseased.
Cancer victims don't suffer alone. Their loved ones suffer with them.
We don't suffer with pain, no. We suffer with the anxiety of the wish for health or relief.
Never knowing what would come. Always on tenterhooks.
That's just the way life works. Until you left.
Now you've left us. To suffer without you is almost harder.
It's not the death that's tough. It's the living that comes after.
In simple terms, there are three stages. For us watching the victims.
The first. Living a nearly normal life, nothing's wrong.
The second. Accepting the cancer and learning to live with you in pain.
The third. Living without you.
Cancer is mean. Cancer is selfish.
Cancer kills without a cause. Cancer.

After 26 days
I realize that I was not in the right place
to make any decision for both of us
I also realize that being in love with you
is a choice that I keep on making
every single day

I try to look brave, confident and strong
in front of everyone, it may be wrong.
It's because I learned to hide
what I really feel inside.
Even if it kills me, I am too proud
to show the real me to the crowd.
Unlike most people I always thought
it's better to have regrets than remorses.
So yes I'm dying behind my disguise
but you'll never see it through my eyes.