The only bond between us was the illusion of what could have been.
A lie that I kept in my heart like a prayer that I believed in.
Just a delusion of finding someone, who could have, would have, understood me beyond the touch of my skin.
But, once the smoke cleared I found myself again standing in the shadows of a hope that was never there.

I know you are the type
Who loves feeling sad
Who builds a temple out of sorrow
To worship your despair

I know you dream of death
Not real death
But escape
Like a love story
That ends absolute

I know you like the dark
And fear light
For someone might shine it down your well
And you won't be able to hide

I know you are the type
Who fears light
For fear of being burned
Who fears smiling
For fear of crying again

I stood there in the rain
Hoping that maybe
It would wash away
All of my memories
Of you.

I look the same, every time I check
In the mirror I see nothing but a wreck
You say I'm nice, but what the heck;
How nice would I be with a slit across my neck?

a young boy, thin and bony
grew up,
grew up quiet and lonely
a young boy, the sweetest boy
grew up,
grew up filled with joy

a teenager, still quiet and lonely
grew up,
grew up with two friends only
a teenager, the nice guy
grew up,
grew up vulnerable and shy

a middle aged man, gone rotten
grown up,
grown up forgotten
a middle aged man, left broken
grown up,
grown up with emotions never spoken