'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
did gyre and gimble in the wabe.
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
the frumious Bandersnatch!"
He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the maxome foe he sought-
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood a while in thought.
As in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came.
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack.
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
"Has thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Calloh! Callay!
He chortled in his joy.
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

Mayonnaise is not an instrument
it
is gorgeous
is better
is nothing but oil
is on sale right now for $1
is so easy to prepare that one often wonders why
is made with lemon juice instead of vinegar
is on Facebook, sign up for Facebook to connect with I hate mayonaise
is in your extended network
is just fat
and yet
is my favorite Smashing Pumpkins song

Listen, girls, it's time to stop stalling,
Can you hear? It's chocolate calling,
It's midnight, not even morning,
Listen it's chocolate calling,
Creep through the house,
Quiet as a mouse,
You've bought a box for your mother,
Well, you can buy her another,
Shhhh, don't tell anyone,
Unwrap chocolate number one,
Eat me, please!
So what for fat hips and knees,
Do you hear?Time to stop stalling,
Listen girls, it's chocolate calling.....

I thought I checked the Bisquick.
I eyed it pretty good.
They came out light and fluffy.
Just like good pancakes should.

The children wanted seconds.
The baby ate with glee,
But in my bite I found a worm,
And no one knows but me.

When I get old and live with my kids
I'm gonna do all the things that they did
I'll get up way before dawn
I will be their human alarm
I scream I'm hungry in the wee morning hours
I will complain when it's time to take a bath or shower
I'll scribble my latest creation on the walls
And on the siding I'll bounce all my *****
I'll spill my milk, so the cat can drink
I won't scrap my plate, when I put it in the sink
I'll refuse to eat my veggies and meat
And if able, run wild in the street
I'll set real close to the tv, blocking their view
Clicking all the channels before I am through
I will change clothes a million times a day
And when I'm done, on the floor they will lay
And when they have taken about all they can stand
I will say "I love you" while I'm holding their hand
And at night when I am fast asleep
In my door they will creep
And softly say "doesn't she look so innocent and sweet"
As they gently cover up my feet