It's really hard to care
In a life lived in despair
Keeping thoughts confined
To a world that's so unkind

I'll lose my mind

I can't let them see
I'm dying to be free
Shake the shackles lose
****** and bruised

I've paid my dues

I've tasted agony
Down on bended knee
Loved ones I have lost
It's such a cost

My heart gets tossed

They'll just stand and stare
As I escape life's little snare
As I fly off away elsewhere
To beauty beyond compare

I'll meet my loved ones there

It's really hard to care
In a life lived in despair
So I'll take this tragedy
Just to set myself free

some dogs run fast.



some run slower.



some dogs don’t run

anymore.



sbm.

Thanks to you I can hear what I think,
And thanks to that my sanity bleeds.
So because of my thoughts I'll have to drink
To wash away all of my bad deeds.
I can't take my depressing thoughts,
The darkness takes me in and tells me what I'm not;
It's the light that screams forget me not,
I guess I'm not who I thought.
The lack of sight is from the lack of light,
The voices in my head thrive at that time.
I’ve never been a fan of the night,
Or a fan of this stupid, every other line rhyme.
The cause of my mind’s insanity,
Is the darkness in which I live and breathe
It’s slowly killing me,
And causing me to lose my sleep
With no hope to carry on;
But along with my sleep, in the endless night I weep;
There's no where I can find to belong.
I find peace within my misery;
The darkness will always take over,
It will take all of my sanity, every part of me,
But it's the light that keeps me mentally sober;
There is hope, because the darkness always comes to an end,
And the black of the night will give me up.
The light I will depend,
The darkness it will disrupt .
The light reminds me of who I am.
It's the dark that I will always fight,
Until the night swallows me whole again,
I’ll have to depend on the light.

My hopes was flying way to high
Way up there in the bright blue sky
For just a moment I forgot
This is not where my train stops

I forgot my sky's are gray
I forgot only sadness finds it's way
Through sorrow's mist
It was something I had dismissed

Just for a moment my thoughts ran away
Just for a minute I let them stray
Thinking plans would all work out
That bucking horse, I wouldn't have to mount

I let them float way to far
Past the clouds, past the stars
So this is all my fault
I put the horse behind the cart

The rope was cut
The dream got bent
This smile I only rent
Happiness for me was never ment

©Pauline Russell

Sipping seconds like drops of ache
Unsettling simultaneously as they
Fill in the void of the moment
Fulfill the prophesy of the long gone
And never remembered by mind alone
Stupid so so stupid - the mind says
So we flip the protective switches
And bury the dreadful thoughts
Because there is something bigger
Greater meaning that begs to be enveloped
As years pass with the same consistency
Of a rational psychosis
Just step off a cliff
And suppose you will learn to fly
Leave it up to faith

Isn't it marvelous
This light ripe like a juicy orange
Filling the clouds with luminous presence
That feels like something
Beyond my comprehension
Simply sit at the root of the tree staring
At its rugged skin and bright flesh
Peering through the cracks
I sense its aliveness as blood
Flowing through my veins
Warm and real and finite
I press my cheek against it
Feeling its breath
As I inhale you exhale
Simple coexistence
Interdependence
That makes me cry

Love,
What on earth do you want with me?
I have tried everything I can think of,
I said everything I can say,
I got lost a lot,
and somewhere along the way,
I still hoped I'd find you
but you're still too elusive for me.

Cherie Nolan © 2016