If you had stayed.



I would have never learned to color my own sky blue
it would have stayed blue

If you had called.

I would have become accustomed to a familiar voice
and not create one in my head
jostled sounds to create comfort

If I had known you’d vanish.

I would have visited
called you myself
and told you goodbye.




-  the heartbreak was not that you left, but the way you left
-Chloe Aldecoa

six.
small fingers counted the days until I could perish with the wind.
become one with the stars.

mother wept into the arms of her reflection
what life had become, she could not say.
father drowned himself in toxins
what had become of him,

no one could say.






in his love
I found my limits.
in his temper
I found my strength.

and in his absence
I found my voice.

Listen.

-if I’m being honest, your inability to raise me was the best way to let me grow
-Chloe Aldecoa

I have storms brewing within me,
Hurricanes, tornadoes, lightning
I am who I was and will be
Stars birthing in the sky,
bursting and creating
Universes
I was your world.

I have jungles growing within me,
Towering trees, blossoming flowers
Poisonous animals
I am what I am and what I want to be
Swaying branches and thunderous sounds
roaring and preying
on the weak
I was your adventure
With the abundance of nature’s fury
beneath my skin

I am the rough words of a struggling poet
The discombobulated jumble of rhythm less music
The unfinished art work made in the hour
of darkness
I am horror
I am chaos, utter obliteration

and you,
are nothing.

-Chloe Aldecoa

Pain and love are at one with the heart,
just as a poet and their words are one at spirit
Each, from a divorce of such bitter pastimes
to become one with one another, in mind and in soul

The heart craves love,
just as a poet craves a pencil and a paper,
at every moment of the day
To crave one another, is to build a kingdom
built on love and the powers of a dark past

To only be virtuous in the world,
to have the eyes yearn for the heart,
just as a poet looks in others for inspiration
For their eyes to meet words, just as the heart meets another
and often, to be rooted in each other, such a beautiful phrase

Pain and love are at one with the heart,
just as a poet and their words are one at spirit
Each from the darkest realms of life,
only to be joined to form a brighter road

-Chloe Aldecoa

If you were stranded in the desert
getting slapped by the sun, dying from thirst
I would cry you a river to drink from
because that's the type of person I am

If your voice was lost in the sea of silence
swimming amongst hollers, not making a sound
I would lend you my shaken vocals
because that's the type of person I am

If you fell into unknown depths, lost and broken
incapable of walking, moving, I would cut off my shattered limbs
and give them to you
because that's the type of person I am

If you died today, heartless and incomplete
I would give you my heart, the one that you broke,
so that you would be living in pain,
but at least you'd be living
because that's the type of person I am

-Chloe Aldecoa