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Cassandra Leigh Jun 2014
Two halves of a whole
That's what they always said we were

Ten minutes** after me you were born
I made it to shore
you were Ten minutes out to sea

Ten weeks you spent in incubators
The doctors didn't think you would ever go home
Ten weeks Later you pulled through

Ten years you've been in and out of hospital beds
The surgeons always swore this was the last time, the tumor was gone
Ten years later they were wrong

Ten times You have called me and told me you wanted out
Being in this world was too painful and you couldn't do it anymore
Ten times I have told you if you go I will follow

Twenty years I have watched you drowning
Twenty years I have prayed I could take your pain and make it mine
Twenty years I would rather swallow razor blades than see you hurt
Twenty years I have wanted to save you but know I cannot swim

Ten minutes

I will drown instead
This is a re-write of a previous poem. I hope you all enjoy getting a look at my naked soul
Cassandra Leigh Jun 2014
We are all human
She whispered to no one but herself
From ****** to Hemingway
and Ghandi to Gacy

We all have hearts that beat in battered rhythms
and throats that catch the words we hold inside ourselves
We all live, we all lose, we all love
To accept the darkness in ones self is to finally know peace

We are all human**
And we simply cannot change
Cassandra Leigh Jun 2014
I want to move you in the deepest way
To change your mind and make you stay
If crafted words on paper were enough to make you love me I would write until my fingers bleed
I will send a thousand letters you will never read
Cassandra Leigh Jun 2014
I see your face in strangers
It is the only way I see you now
Cassandra Leigh Jun 2014
Mom
White dress
Soda cans
Blonde hair
Celine Dion
Shouting lyrics
Clumsy dancing
Always swaying
Cigarette smoke
Lifting me
California girls
We sang

Long nights
Constant fighting
Angry shouting
Never home
Rarely conscious
Police officers
Mental illness
****** needles
No music

California bound
Phone calls
Whispering relatives
Sideways glances
Bipolar Disorder
Drug ******
Gone

I still sing without you
Cassandra Leigh Jun 2014
You turned to me and said everything looks better in the sunlight
The way you feel it sink into your weary bones and for a moment everything In the world seems right

I couldn't argue as I watched it dancing on your skin
I had always been more fond of moonlight and it's subtle promise of impending sin

I drank you in

Nothing will ever be as sweet as cheap red wine sipped while you held me like a secret
Now memories are the only thing keeping me warm, but there is nothing to regret
Cassandra Leigh Jun 2014
Ice
When I was thirteen I overheard a conversation
The police were saying how tragic my story was
Due to the toxicity of what I had seen I would never know the difference between pain and love
Out of all the things to remember my mind chose that
I have never been accussed of loving too much
Because to me love is the most excruciating  thing a person can feel
I guess he was right
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