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 Jan 2017 Bethanybelove
anu
Thank you
To all who really supported me
My Hp Family Members
 Jan 2017 Bethanybelove
Pax
Problems
 Jan 2017 Bethanybelove
Pax
No matter how far you've run
Doesn't even matter what you drink
Or just get ******
It will just come back to the way it were
Keep on dodging
Escape like the wind blows
But comes back as fast as the river flows
Run to the infinite puzzle if answers are not found
It's a maze that keeps us running in circles
Solutions are as taught as crystal rock
Still you know the answers are there
We just have to stop evading
And face it with courage.
"its a matter on how you handle each of the problem that comes across your life."

an old piece, stay strong everyone...
happy holidays...
 Jan 2017 Bethanybelove
Pax
You who have done wrong, who thinks your right.
In subsequent to your anger towards me,
you have no [right].
Still i ignore your snubs
treated it as a bluffs.
Glad that you ignore me
at times, even if you bore a grudge on me.
I'll received it as a parting gift
to forget whatever causes of grief
you've done.

I know this words will never reach you,
cause in life i don't want to give birth
to more misunderstanding. I am already
misunderstood and mistreated at times.

I just want to live-up to the silence of my comfort.
My independence is enough
to have a strong mind
and a stable heart to withstand
all the backslash of tongues.

a quote says:
everybody needs somebody sometimes
well i don't need one when I'm still able.

raw
"siya na yung may kasalanan, siya pa yung may ganang magalit and mag damdam. ang kapal, talaga..."

Now I understand that Bullies have low EQ(emotional quotient). They just tend to have fun at you all the times without realizing that they've done too much. It been long i haven't wrote something like a journal. I just want to release this thoughts running on my mind.
 Jan 2017 Bethanybelove
L B
“…Take your place on the Great Mandala as it moves through your brief moment of time…
Win or lose now
You must choose now
and if you lose, you’re only losing your life…”  Peter, Paul, and Mary
___________

Stitching the hem of a prom dress to the
Chicago Convention on TV
Pink brocade, white gloves to the elbow

Night sticks snap skulls

“...and a time on a 27 will always shine a light”

Seven Day War
but neither of us dance

Whispered under weeping willows
“What will become of us?”

“The New Left” scrawled in my yearbook
under Danny’s name
I stared at him puzzled, half-attracted

The New Left came
from Harvard, Radcliffe, Mars?
to the grimy streets of Lowell
to teach us “worker kids”
‘bout our sorry selves

Aloof
from our bad teeth, unplanned pregnancies
stuccoed bungalows
chrome kitchen sets circa ’53
So far beyond

Alienated
by our worn out dens
with proud TV’s
the evening’s beer proclivity

They, weren’t “Right on!”
with the smell of furniture polish and
lifetimes of motor oil on overalls

We were okay to be organized though
before they left—

Because they knew what mattered!
…and “How could WE  know so little!
‘bout Lenin, Marx?
the exploits of profit and endless war?"

How could THEY know so little—
  
about the death down the street
‘bout the conflict caused by *in-house “Pigs”

Husbands in Canada
Brothers in Nam

Dying small-town, piece-work kids
Labor's legacy
Lost bourgeois

Freezing on street corners
Telephone’s tapped
Handing out leaflets

to talk of guns...

“Our people blew up the Bank of America!
You know”

To talk of guns…

While Black Panthers were dying
No ******' around

Hell’s Angels—  graphite ghosts
hover in ****** shadows of shared back yard
Revolutionary panic as
mafia muscle makes an appearance
comes-on to me
sped-up and pulls a pistol!…
_____

Guts ran out the holes in my head

Lonely now
…and not so… ready?

Someone suggested “experience”
to explain for certain
the face on the clock
the of wince of Time
and all the reasons there were to die

Should ‘ave asked why— they called it “acid”

Connecting the dots of despair
I saw it all— for the first time

and lost— everything
*in-house pigs:   cops in the family

Definitely a GOOD LISTEN.
Another amazing song from Susan's dorm room: The Great Mandala--
Peter, Paul, and Mary-- probably their best and most important song!

6https://www.google.com/search?q=the+great+mandala+peter+paul+and+mary+you+tube&ie;=utf-8&oe;=utf-8

This was the height of the American Civil Rights and Anti War
Movements of the late 1960s.
I was trying to capture something of the American despair and drive for change of that time. Not all of us were drugged hippie flower children. Some of us actually saw the extent of the loss around us, and in my case, anyway, thought I was witnessing the last possibility for change-- the last throes of conscience of a once hopeful people.
I was also really young, facing what I am sure now, was the truth and was really afraid of dying. Thought acid (LSD) would reveal meaning-- sort of a religious search.  Only did it once-- You know what they say about "What never happens the first time..."  Happened.
members were promptly shown the exit door
*OUT

if they didn't follow the orders of the head
SCOUT

he'd lay down the law in the club's meeting
ROOM
whilst everyone shivered listening to his
BOOM

after a time numbers of supporters did
DECLINE
as of his bully boy tactics they'd not
ENSHRINE

the lust for power he couldn't easily
REPRESS
an ultimatum was always his way of
ADDRESS

these days no people sign up with the
COHORT
for they'd heard of the bulldozer's bossy
RETORT

leagues that have despotic types in
COMMAND
shall fall into disuse like an unwanted
*BRAND
 Jan 2017 Bethanybelove
Illya Oz
To not let them win

They said to not give them a reaction
To not get angry
because that's what they wanted
Then they would just go away

So I did

I didn't give them a reaction
And I was only ever nice to them
And they did get bored
and when away

But they had still won

They were only ones
that could've been my friends
Without them I was by myself
Sitting all alone while they forgot me

I had still lost
This was what happened to me when I was in primary school and I spent many years at school alone untill high school where I have meet many wonderful friends. But from my experiences I have leant that it is not always useful for children to follow the advice adults give them.
 Jan 2017 Bethanybelove
Illya Oz
When your a child your mum says
"Time out!" And "Go to your room!"

But when your a teenager she says
"Get out of your room you need some time out!"
As a little kid my mum always told me to go to my room because I was misbehaving, but now she is always yelling at me for spending too much time in it.
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