For the third time, I’ve found myself *******
in the reality of how I was perceived
by the people who passed me on the sidewalk,
or who met me at the party, or who
took my heart and collided it with their hips.

And by now even I know that I should know
how the rest of the conversation will go.
My cheekbones will grace the slander
of a compliment skewed, a lust
for my body ruined by misplaced intentions.
My agreement
to go back to his room was never welcomed
by my head, but instead
the sad bed with its sheets already turned down
waits for me and I hate it. I hate it
like an insomniac hates sleep, like the sun
loves ice cream.

For the third time, I’ve found myself smashed
into a wall of circumstances, appearances
cushioning the blow. My pretty face,
my pretty face, my pretty face!
God, how I’d love to put on a show
so you could see how my mind tumbles
across all the roads I know I shouldn’t be crossing.
How my eyes dance on every temptation just waiting
for the hand to be dealt, for the bet to be placed.

For the third time, I’ve let myself be bound
by the vibration of reassurance, by the ring
of a telephone. I’ve lost
a part of myself in you. How haphazardly ineloquent
it all seems in my nightmares, how blessed
the rest of the world must be to know this pain
and be able to stop themselves from feeling it.
How dark
it is under your seat

They called me a pessimist
And I guess I am
I mean it's true
But it's not my fault that the autumn days are dark
Whispering harshly in the night
Ripping leaves off of trees
Leaving them limp and bare to survive winter
The little winds foreshadow the coming brutal storms
That leave us cold in terror
But the breeze is so powerful
It numbs my skin like a drug
Keeps my blood rushing, wanting more
And my eyes are pleased to see the rainfall of the leaves
From branches of clouds
So beautiful
Then comes the holidays and cremed cocoas
The laughter and the dazzling crisp snow
One true pessimist
They call me but I'll go with it and let it go

November 22/1963,
the day remembered in infamy,
a great man vanished,
Camelot was banished.

He rode in a deathly motorcade,
one where history was made.
Cheers deafened the mass,
he was shot by an outcast.

His smile charmed his people,
nobody was his equal.
His slick hair swayed in the Texas air,
he would soon have a new heir.

His convertible top was down,
his waves controlled the town.
His presence was tremendous,
the shot was stupendous.

CRACK, CRACK, CRACK,
two shots made contact,
his head burst in two,
the question was, who?

Head in lap, Jackie cried,
her eyes wet like low tide.
Men in black rushed to the car,
the shooter now afar.

Rushed to the hospital in haste,
the air possessed a bad taste.
The news was all about,
his life very much in doubt.

Hours passed with slow pace,
peoples tears burned like mace.
A country was without a head,
LBJ is the man they said.

Finally the time had come,
the news startling none,
JFK is dead! JFK is dead!
The people mourned in dread.

The age of youth was out,
times of havoc were about,
JFK is dead! JFK is dead!
The country is still in dread.