I miss all of those deep feelings
Of caring so much for someone
Telling them "I love you so much"
Thinking and dreaming about them
I miss thinking about them all day
Nonstop thoughts drown my head
About how beautiful she is to me
I imagine how other people see us
"They are such a beautiful couple"
"They are so cute together" I imagine
I wish I had all of these feelings back
Sleeping well at night without a fright
Relaxing days go in to peaceful nights
Only if I have all of these feelings back
But, I do still have some of these feelings
They never left my dying heart and soul
I often still think and dream about her
She still haunts me when I tell her to leave
I still have nightmares of you and death
I can't destroy these now unwanted feelings
I only wish now, I had someone else to see
Someone else to call beautiful and sweet
I wish that now, I can find happiness again
And regain all of the lost feelings I once had

This is a deception; it's a masquerade

You'll of course picture a cheerful parade

I'll fade from your memory; happy and smiling

Often laughing and most times beguiling



Take no note of my mask's crumbling surface

I lived through my life without any purpose

And I'll always stay trapped, inside of your mind

A guy, willingly helpful and foolishly kind



But behind the scenes, I'll cry myself to sleep

And this illusive image, of me I will keep

I've never held close, my family and friends

But you'll never know this, until the show ends



The show, it'll end suddenly; so that you may see

How quickly the world has changed without me

And I'll be left fading, from the people's mind

As they cherish every moment, of me left behind



I'll carefully fold and leave behind this note

Stained with tears and guilt; last one that I wrote

As you slowly reveal in it, the many reasons why

I finally decided it was time for my "goodbye"



You'll re-read it, you'll drop it and begin to cry

And you'll remain this girl, broken and shy

As my gentle words leave trails of tears engraved

You regret me being the one, that you could have saved



You'll uncover my pain; I was bruised and torn

As too many nights passed, I wished I wasn't born

Then you'll tear up, regret accepting my fate

You'll realise that we shared the same stupid hate



And in the distance, the wind chimes they'll sing

As the bitter Winter slowly fades to Spring

I'll stay captive, in a cage of reminiscence

As you embrace my fading image of innocence



So I closed my eyes, I died weak but brave

And I know that someday, you'll stand upon my grave

And the Autumn leaves, they'll whisper my name

As you gently bow down, your head in shame