I write in silence, letters like whispers,
to a world I am unable to connect with.
I sit here at the edge of it all,
feeling way too much, saying far too little.

Then she arrived, with her eyes like a portal to a better place. They pulled me in; into music, into nights that stretched forever, into the kind of living I thought I’d only ever watch in movies or read in books.

And there we were, wrapped in the warmth of shared secrets, and I knew, in that moment, we were infinite.

But infinity has its darkness.
I watched as pain hid behind familiar smiles.
And I realized that love, in all its beauty,
is never quite as simple as it seems.

Life is a tapestry woven with threads of acceptance, where those who blossom in kindness thrive, and those ignored or mistreated carry the weight of silence.

Each story, a reflection of who we are,
each moment, a call for understanding,
reminding us that the heart finds light
in the embrace of those who,
truly see us for who we are.

Memories resurfaced once more, dark and quiet, pulling me back to places I’d tried to forget. In the end, I came to understand the quiet truth:

We accept the love we think we deserve.


— Sincerely, Boris

My periods turn to semicolons
My suicide notes to poetry
My goodbyes became hellos
The blades turn to sunflowers
And the bullets, a rose
My heart still is broken
But the pieces have been found
Death isn’t for me anymore
What is, in the here and now
I still don’t feel enough
But I am alive
And that’s enough to say
Today is not the day I die.

solitude is the warm, afternoon sun
that shines on your skin
the kind that makes you feel
sleepy and lazily comfortable
the kind that makes you
doze off to a string of daydreams

solitude is the stale, cold air
that creeps through your open windows at night
the kind that embraces you
while you're tucked beneath your sheets
the kind that gets you restless
as you toss and turn to a string of thoughts

it is precisely the gap between
a knowing, comfortable silence and restlessness

i toss and turn,
i pace back and forth between silence and restlessness
i am at peace
yet i am at a state of unrest
i like solitude today
yet i also feel lonely tonight

am i at peace or
am i merely stuck in a state of nothingness?

are you at peace?
or do you merely dream of being at peace?

— cs wondering

we are not the same
i was falling apart
you were falling in love

we are the same
i was falling in love
you were falling apart

we are not the same
i found myself through us
you lost yourself through us

we are the same
i lost myself through us
you found yourself through us

just an inch closer
I'm almost there

oh, you've taken a new step

just an inch closer
we're almost there

oh, you've changed your mind

a mere inch it may be
but on parallel standings,
we're still worlds apart

that's okay
we were almost there

— cs wondering

Less or nothing,
Give of your heart,
That still makes a difference.
18/7/2024