Written off as a label, condemned to live the wrong life
But wanting to go back and say sorry for what he's done.
Once he realizes there's no going back, that's he's doomed to hearing 'she'
It's enough to make him realize his debt was great
So great that it must last his whole life.
Even if he changes his body he'll always have scars
To pay for the ones he gave to girls
And to those that were different who he used to shame.
That fateful night when he stupidly wished
To come back as a girl, to run away from his problems.
He was an idiot, a liar and a cheat
And he deserved every punishment he got.
But now that he knows he can't escape, he can't hit rewind
He just wants to end the pain and he wants sympathy
But even if he got it, what would that do?
What if he's just sorry he was caught?
I beg you, please change me back
Please stop me from being such an ***
I repent from my thoughtless and ignorant remarks
Because this is the worst punishment of all!
To become the labels that bring pain and sorrow
To those I forced them on
And to realize that like them I can't wake up tomorrow
And see who I really am.
My body and life is a lie or some terrible dream
But I can feel it all happening, all tearing at me.
And not just how the body of someone else looks
But at the soul that is in fact me.
Get me out of this cage, make me feel unashamed
To be a man and to face my problems
And to truly repent for my mistakes
And be okay with who I now know myself to be.
I can barely look at her face anymore,
The girl who I wished to become lightly
I just want to be rid of every trace of her
And go back to being simple, better me.
10th April 2016