Julie Mullins

Aug 2018

emnabee

The poet lives two lives.
One on the outside,
And one in their mind.

When you look in their eyes
You could see an abyss.

If you looked long enough
You could sink into it.

But most people don’t see it.

Take the time to read the words, though,
And you would know for sure.

The poet lives in two different worlds.

A little escape from the madness.
Or maybe, into.

#secret #life #poets

Julie Mullins Aug 2018

Puzzle Space

I live in a house
With nine people,
That's including me.
And maybe I should
Be happy to have
A roof over my head,
But I'm not happy.
I feel guilty and ashamed.
I feel out of place.
I feel like I'm a piece
Of a puzzle that doesn't
Belong to this puzzle.
I do want to be here and
I do love it here, but
Maybe not at the price of
Someone's space.

Things are both very depressing and looking up.
Working on myself is just a little hard...

#happy #guilt #ashamed #puzzle #space

Jul 2018

Travis Allen

I am Both

I am Both
I am held together,
I melt away.
I am the voice that speaks for pay
I am at a loss for what to say.
I am the day, I am the night
I am the peace; I am the fight.
I am the love, I am the hate
I am on time, I come in late.

I am the good, I am the bad
I am the real, I am the fad.
I am with you, I am alone
I am the sewer, I am cologne.

I am the rich, I am the poor
I am the nun; I am the *****.
I am the door, I am the wall
I am the big, I am the small.
I am the doubt, I am belief
I am the long, I am the brief.
I am the servant, I am the king
I am the mute, I too can sing.

I am the mansion, I am the shack
I am the plenty; I am the lack.
I am the truth, I am the lies
I am the laugh; I am the cry.

I am the bitter, I am the sweet
I am the win, I am defeat.
I am the up, I am the down
I am the smile; I am the frown.

I am the calm, I am the strife
I am the death; I am the life.

I am the two of all we see,
Both good and bad we come to be.
When the finite's in eternity,
Both good and bad reside in me.

Because I am the fire, I am the snow
I am holding on; I am letting go.
I am satisfied, I am discontent
I am the sender; I am the sent.
I am the foe, I am the friend
I am the start I am the END.

This was from a classic, "I am poem", prompt. I was reading the entry of each of my contemporaries, and all were writing on either end of the spectrum. All good, or all bad. I thought you know depending on the circumstances I am capable of both, therefore "I am both".

Julie Mullins Jun 2018

Begging

Your smiles and sorry's
Are like bad habits
That never die hard.

Begging for my forgiveness
Knowing if you beg
Just enough,
I'll break like a twig
Under your feet.

I am a nice person,
A nice, forgiving person.
But-
Even I know that
Eventually, there is a pattern.
You are bound,
To this Earth,
To make the same mistakes.

Your same mistakes
Are like a bad drug.
You can't just shake it.
Withdrawal-
Night sweats and hallucinations.
Gotta go back for more.
Itching for that burning taste.
There you are,
Begging again...

And I'm not giving it to you anymore.

#drugs #nightsweats #halucinations #begging #bedhabit

Julie Mullins Jun 2018

Dear Girl Part 2

Dear girl,
Who doesn't know me,
I'm doing better now,
Did you see that coming?

Dear girl,
Who doesn't know me,
Words may hurt,
But they don't break me
Anymore.

Dear girl,
Who doesn't know me,
I've grown to love myself
And that's put me
In a good place.

Dear girl,
Who doesn't know me,
I am human,
Same as you,
And I have survived.

How inspired I am tonight. Honestly, how inspiring life has been the past year. I know that no one here really knows me, but I have grown oh so much and all I have to thank is poetry and my closest friends. "Dear Girl" was written in December of 2017 and "Dear Girl Part 2" was written June 2018.

#bullying #wordsdonthurtanymore #ihavesurvived #happy #selflove

Julie Mullins Jun 2018

Dear Girl

Dear girl,
Who doesn't know me,
Thanks for the insecurities
Tonight.
I've only been bullied
All my life.

Dear girl,
Who doesn't know me,
I hope you feel good
About yourself
Because I'm not.

Dear girl,
Who doesn't know me,
I'll be drowning
In this box of water
That I can't escape.

Dear girl,
Who doesn't know me,
I'm dying
And you're the one
To blame.

I just wrote a part two to this poem as I was about to post it and it has made me so happy. I found inspiration in my own work for another piece. I will be posting it after this one. Much love to this website and all the poets here!

#bullying #bullied #insecurities #drowning #dying

Julie Mullins Jun 2018

I'm Supposed to Know Words

I'm a writer.
I'm supposed to know how to
Chew words up and
Spit them out.
I'm supposed to
Make them float with the clouds
And sit on the horizon with the sunset.
I'm supposed to
Make them run miles
And give them sunburns
While they swim in circles
On the beach of my mind.

#clouds #sunset #beach