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 Dec 2018 XyL0S
eileen
I'm sorry for the plant that died
in my hands

I'm sorry your
plants are dying

I'm a bad luck charm
a silent surprise

I bring the worst out of people
(oftentimes myself)


//  haiku -

losing I'm dehydrated  
haven't you noticed the sun
I can make it leave
 Dec 2018 XyL0S
eileen
ᵃ ˡᶦᵗᵗˡᵉ ᵇᵃᵇʸ
ˢᶦⁿᵍ ᵗʰᵉᵐ ᵗᵒ ˢˡᵉᵉᵖ
ᴵ ᶜʳᶦᵉᵈ ᵗᵒ ᵐʸˢᵉˡᶠ ʷᵃᵏᶦⁿᵍ ᵘᵖ
ᵍᶦᵛᵉ ᵐᵉ ᵇᵃᶜᵏ ᵐʸ ⁿᵒʳᵐᵃˡ ˡᶦᶠᵉ
ᵃ ˡᶦᵗᵗˡᵉ ᵇᵃᵇʸ
ᵗʷᵉⁿᵗʸ⁻ᵉᶦᵍʰᵗ ʸᵉᵃʳˢ ᵒˡᵈ
ᶠᵉᵉˡᶦⁿᵍ ˡᶦᵏᵉ ᵗʰᵉʸ'ʳᵉ ⁿᶦⁿᵉ
ʳᵉᵃᵈ ᵗʰᵉᵐ ᵃ ᵇᵉᵈᵗᶦᵐᵉ ˢᵗᵒʳʸ
ᴵ ᶜᵃⁿ'ᵗ ˢˡᵉᵉᵖ
ʷᶦᵗʰ ᵃˡˡ ᵗʰᵉ ⁿᶦᵍʰᵗᵐᵃʳᵉˢ ᵖˡᵃʸᶦⁿᵍ ᶦⁿ ᵐʸ ʰᵉᵃᵈ
ʷᵉ'ˡˡ ⁿᵉᵛᵉʳ ᶠᵒʳᵍᵉᵗ ᵗʰᵉ ᵐᵒᵐᵉⁿᵗˢ
ʷᵉ ᶠᵉˡᵗ ˢᵒ ⁿᵒʳᵐᵃˡ
ʷᵉ ʰᵒˡᵈ ᵗʰᵉᵐ ᶜˡᵒˢᵉʳ
ᵗʰᵃⁿ ᵃⁿʸᵗʰᶦⁿᵍ
ᴛᴏ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪᴅs
ᴡʜᴏ'ᴠᴇ ʟᴏsᴛ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ʏᴏᴜᴛʜ
ᴛᴏ ᴇᴀʀʟʏ
 Dec 2018 XyL0S
Ally Ann
A friend asked me
how to be a writer.
I wanted to say,
lock yourself in a room,
scream until you have
a poem and no voice.
Open your veins and bleed
until you know that your bones
are pure words and sorrow.
Act as if you slit your own throat
and all you can bleed
are your own regrets
and all of the darkness
you boxed up for inspiration.
Write your mom a letter,
tell her you're leaving
and you won't be back for awhile
Because being a writer is traveling
through all seven layers of Hell
and denying anything is wrong.
Forget loving yourself
when all you have is a pen and paper
fused to your wrist
and Jesus is tapping at your skull
saying turn back now.
Warn the neighbors that if they smell burning
It's just your soul
clawing at the front door trying to get in.
Learn how to be alone.
Learn how to lose everything you have
in order to feel release,
learn how to only feel deceased
from now on.
A friend asked me
how to be a writer.
All I said was
don't
 Dec 2018 XyL0S
Iska
Frozen bubble
 Dec 2018 XyL0S
Iska
Starring at the world
through a fractured freeze frame
Splintering my skin as I draw closer clawing to the faded paint only to end up on the other side
To a world as bland and gray as it was on the other side.
 Dec 2018 XyL0S
Vxlentine
Guilt
 Dec 2018 XyL0S
Vxlentine
I don't know if it's getting worse
or better
All I know is that
Now and then
It hurts again.
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