What does it mean to love?

Quite frankly I am not sure.

What I am sure of, is that I am in love.

I'm in love with someone who is probably never going to feel the same.

And on top of that,

I'm in love with another girl.

A girl that's hurting beyond what she should be.

No matter how hard I try, I cannot bring her light in the darkness.

Yet....I can't help but keep trying.

I try until it hurts, I try until I'm burned.

I try.

I will keep trying until it kills me, because she is worth every minute, every tear, every sleepless lonely night.

She is worth that and so much more, so much more that I'm afraid I can't give it to her.

So I ask again.
What is love exactly?

Love is something that can't be defined. It will require all of your mind, body, and soul.

That is something I am learning the hard way.

But it's worth it.

It's nights like these where my thoughts run free
Climbing mountains of mystery
Chasing dreams that turn to dust
Making me stress, that's a must.

The thoughts that overwhelm me,
That take over my brain and remind me,
They make me feel powerless in the face of my closest one's darkness.
I am just a human, I have no power, no magic, nothing to change the tides

I have only the thoughts in my head,
And false hopes in my heart.

Why?
A question people ask all the time,
A true sincerity without a remedy.

Generations have asked before,
Yet the answer they seek requires more.

More as a person, more so than, an endless search to be better than.

A true question who's answer is worth more than gold, a true answer that's never been sold.

One with a passion and hunger for power, of which makes one desperate, more so by the hour.

Is this conquest really worth it's treasure? A search that could last longer than forever.

All for what? A simple truth, one that wastes away their youth.

Come on! Stop dodging my lines! Why isn't that hard to find!

That's what they say, they always do, though none ever consider the best why for you.

Don't listen, keep pushing, ignore the pain. But don't push too hard for your mind will be sane.

Sanity, clarity, light through the tunnel, but limited perspectives like looking through a funnel.

Ask this my brothers, sisters, friends. Would you be happy for sure in the end?

Thus do not hinder from your treacherous path, unless the answer is worth it to ask.

Happy.

That's what you make me.

When you're happy, as am I. Same can be said for any other emotion.

Emotion.

There's a funny word. Why is it funny? Because I don't feel those.

At least I didn't. I had a cold heart with feelings locked away deep inside.

I was a robot.

Following the motions are easy, but feeling what they bring is hard.

I've never been able to experience this feeling more than once before.

But it is stronger and harder to ignore.

I'm scared, quite terrified, but I'm also a little selfish.

I want you to myself, I don't want to share, I get jealous and protective, even though you aren't mine.

Not yet. Maybe not ever.

Maybe one day I will be able to hold you in my arms and say, "Remember when you gave me feelings and melted my heart?"

Because my dear, you may not know it, but...

I'm falling for you.

You.
The one who plagues my mind.
You.
The one who I think of all the time.
You.
The one over whom I'll admit I slightly obsess.
You.
The one who has taken hold of my heart.
You.
The one who is becoming my entire focus.
You.
Yes you, you know who you are.
You.
The one who has brought me back to the stars.
You.
The very thing that keeps me sane.
You.
You completely fill my brain.
You.
The one I'm soon to call mine.
You.
I love you, till the end of time.