There's a hole in my heart
Waiting to be filled
Just please don't fill it
With something like poison
Cause oh how I wish
You knew what this heart of stone really is

I may be rich
But I'm not a *****
Stop pushing me in
To those like trash bins
Don't want to be judged
Or hold any grudge
Please hear me out
Before I pout

I will not ever forget
How much I relentlessly could never wait to see
The numbers behind your eyes
How, when I saw 10
I knew instantly you were sad
I saw 10 when I saw
How you kissed that pretty girl
More passionately than when you kissed me
How you saw me
As a shattered piece of China
Regretful of what was
And In pain of what you couldn't fix
I saw 9 when your dog died
And I saw 9 when I left
I saw 8 when we fought
About something you didn't do
About something important
That has now been lost in the void called memories
I saw 7 when you called off our anniversary
'Cause I got hospitalized
And you were worried sick
How you couldn't live another day without me
I saw 6 when you got sick and I called off our date
I saw 5 the first time you confessed
With all the effort
And all the flowers
In stems and in words
And I without remorse
Turned you down
I saw 4 when I confessed
With none of the flowers
Nor intentions because I thought
I was being unfair
I saw 3 on our first date
How your eyes lit up
When you saw me
In that little blue dress
And every single date after
I see 2 everytime you saw me
2, everytime we held hands
2, every single time we were together
Here I am
Wanting to go back to 1
I saw 1 the first time I kissed you
And you kissed me back
1, everytime we kissed
1, The first time I spent the night
1, Everytime I spent the night
1, The first time I told you
Oh My God I think I love you
1, Everytime I told you
My God I still do
1, The first time I told you there wasn't a forever
But I promised you
Infinity exists
And everytime single time I called you
My Infinity

My Infinity,
Infinity does exist for us
My love
It lies in what has happened
And how much we remember
How much we can grab hold of
Inside our void of memories

My infinity,
How much of a fool I am
To realize your eyes
Are only reflections of mine

My Infinity,
You haunt me every nanosend
Of every second of my life

My Infinity,
Please
Never
Let
Go.


My Self,
Find the person
Who doesn't have all those sparkly numbers
Deep within their sparkly eyes
Who never speaks of math
Nor numbers
Nor anything related to Infinity
And
Forget your love  for numbers
And never ending endings

Dear Self,
Please.

maybe it's just me
who grew numb to the word "sorry"
which was repeatedly said to me
so many times it's lost its meaning

maybe it's just me
who's having a hard time to forgive
when my patience is broken
my feelings are shattered

it's weird that I don't know
I feel my eyes as they dampen
why do I let these things happen?
I have yet to find an answer

part of me says to stay away
how much does this hurt weigh?
so much pain in one day
but a meaningless sorry can't make it okay

maybe I don't understand
the things that are at hand
but what is your goal?
your personality's as black as coal

I felt it in my gut
that this whole thing was going to rot
you left me standing there
in a place I couldn't bear

but who am I to judge
we're not in a court of justice
I don't have a gavel to declare you guilty
to prove to others such false humility

maybe God is just testing my patience
making me remember all of His faithfulness
my sufferings are yet to end
but my scars remained for God to mend

Myriad of stars
are brighter. But still I find
this beauty in you

Your eyes aren't the stars for me
But instead they're earth
Because I find life in them

Why is it easy to make
But so hard to feel

Love is oh so powerful
That I have been warned
Of what may happen to this fragile heart of mine
And whatever my mind would do

I write upon a blank space
A rhyming composition
And give out all these feelings
The love that flows within me
And keeps me engaging to new things
But why do I feel so pained thinking about it
That the love that'll happen to me would be changing me to a different person
It may be because I think of a certain someone
Or I am just pessimistic about everything as usual
But at all times I know that

*Love is what moves the heart the most.

He wanted me
To keep loving him
Even though
It's against my will

So I kept
Forcing the thrill
In the concept
Of a wounding scheme

I was born on a full moon night in August
Cold winds
Cool breeze
I came into this awful world
with hatred and love to spare
Clouds that once threatened the sky
released their anger on the night sky
In the eye of the storm
A sleeping chick beside my form
Knowing instinctively
My life
would never follow
the usual storm