You sat there waiting for me in the dingy cafe,
You had pills hidden in your purse,
I should have smelled the tainted smoke in your breath,
This is all it's actually worth.

My time I spend, each day I try
To fix up this messed up life,
While the pain never subsides.

I was waiting for you at one time,
I had believed in your sense of direction,
Your understanding and convictions,
All failed with but simple inspection.

My life I lead, this whine and your greed,
Pain in my heart with how you speak
Like you're the only one I ever truly need.

In the end I was looking for someone else,
They were lovely, beautiful and smart,
Kind to animals and fighting for causes.
You know why I stopped waiting on you?

*Because that isn't the least bit of what you are...

May Christ bless you today and touch your heart like never before. love you all in Christ.

Take a deep breath,
see the pain was just a catch.
This ship has yet to sail,
so just exhale.
You might think your heart’s mangled,
your throat’s so raw from screaming, it’s like you’ve been strangled.
Fists clenched,
hair drenched,
mascara so far down your cheeks
it appears in muddled black streaks.
See you put your heart in the palm of his hands
thinking to yourself, “the rest of the world be ******”
so sure taking care of it was what he planned.
Two feet in,
love rolled out, seeking you like a bowling ball and you the pin.
You never stood a chance,
this love was a “Bad Romance”
but that song didn’t forewarn
that there was nothing like his scorn.
You wanted his ugly parts, but not this
for it was seeping into your every shared kiss.
But, take solace in this,
the fact that you’ll experience a bigger, real kind of bliss.
This pain will fade,
you’ll meet someone who doesn’t use his words as a blade.
These wounds will heal,
and you’ll start to feel
new things; a new start
in this book of life, you’ll realize this hurt was just a small part.
Next time, a man’s fists won’t hurt, they’ll mend.
His words won’t aim to tear you down, but for you they’ll defend.
Your hair will be drenched, not from a fight in the rain, but from a shower shared.
Your mascara will be spared.
Your heart will stay steadily beating,
for this time his love won’t be fleeting.
It’ll be with him, that ship will sail
and hand in hand you’ll both prevail.
So take a deep breath; exhale.
Use this knowledge to your avail.
Stop making excuses
for these healing and newly formed bruises.
Stop fighting him, and start fighting for YOU
it’s time for your beautiful beginning; for you to start anew.
Leave the hurt and the heavy weight on your shoulders behind
for even though this is only a poem you’ll find
that you now understand,
the risk that’s at hand.
Realize what you deserve,
show him that he’s not someone you serve.
Know your worth,
and know you’ve been destined for so much more than this since birth.