Then
i just hope
love will find me
once again
.

The scars on my body,
Are my own.
No one else can see,
No one else can know,
No one else can care.
The things I do to my body,
Are my ***** little
Guilty pleasures.
I can’t get enough of the rush,
I can’t get the image of my blood spilling out
I can’t get the blade to fall.
I need to feel the sting,
I need to feel the pain,
I need to feel something.
I am addicted…
To the blade on my skin,
Cutting into my skin,
Waiting for the crimson lines to appear.
I am addicted,
To the feeling of retribution.
I know I deserve it,
I deserve every cut inflicted,
Every burn I administer
I deserve all the pain I give myself.
I know I am nothing,
I know all I bring is pain,
I know no one will ever see me for who I am.
All I can do is hope,
That one day I can get help,
That one day someone will care,
That one day,
I will be in recovery.
Until that day,
All I know is
I have to keep
Cutting.

You've tried to be happy,

But you cannot do it,

The darkness is just too dark,

You talk and talk,

But all it does is makes depression worse,

You’ve tried to be with people that you love and that love you,

But that gets to overwhelming,

So you keep in the pain,

All it does is make others worry

People ask why are you in so much pain,

They say they can help,

But when you cannot help yourself how can others help you?



After a while all your pain turns to anger,

You cannot help but yell and say things that you do not mean to say,

When you want the help that others have offered to you,

But you are afraid to ask,

So you still keep all the pain in! As time goes on, you have more pain, more anger,

Now you cannot take life on any more,

So you write a very long letter to all that have tried to help,

Fold it neatly, and put a heart on it,

You go into your room and hang yourself,

Now your pain is gone,

But what about everyone else,

Did you think how they would feel?



Sure you were hurting,

Yes you were depressed,

But now your mom doesn't speak, only cries,

Your dad asks himself a billion times a day "What did i do wrong,"

Your little sister doesn't eat, sleep, and doesn't want to go to school,

All your friends; God bless them,

They knew the pain you were going through,

They know the pain that your family is going through,

So they try their best to help your family,

And also to help one another,

Your girlfriend cuts now, will not eat now, and will never date again!



You've hurt so many people,

Just because you could not handle the darkness with in,

And now that you are gone,

Your friends cannot take the pain,

So they quit talking to one another,

Your mom has a drinking problem,

Your dad does drugs,

And your sweet little innocent sister,

Watching your family wither away to nothing!

Don't fall in love with my style,
Or the way I wear my hair.
Don't fall in love with my scars,
Or the makeup I might wear.
Don't fall in love with my skin,
Or my lack of self care.
Fall in love with my voice,
When I'm in awe or fright.
Fall in love with the poetry,
I choose to read and write.
Fall in love with my eyes,
Even if they dim and fade.
And save me from my demons,
And the heart they roughly played.
Just fall in love with me,
And the way I live.
This is all I can be,
And it is all I will give.