Why am I not like her?

She has the most beautiful skin,

Remarkable appearance with red plump lips,

Everyone can’t help but wonder as she passes by

How can someone be so pretty?

One Day I came across the thought

Why am I not pretty like her??

I go back and stare at the mirror like never before…

Her body shape like an hourglass made my faint curves shy

Her spotless skin mocked mine with acnes and freckles

Her brown eyes with long lashes while I had bags below my eyes

Her plump lips versus mine that looks dreadful

Why can’t I be like her?

“Maybe because I’m nothing infront of her”

I again take my attention back to myself in the mirror

Just picturing her remarkable feature in my head makes me look ugly

makes me look like a trash, garbage and useless…

Why am I not like her?

I question myself with tears that can’t help but fall down my eyes

I'm tired.
Tired of everything.
I just want to sleep,
And never wake up again.

No, I'm not lazy,
I'm not running away from life.
I'm just tired of the world and myself,
And too tired to change anything.

looking at you,
i felt so distant.
i will never feel as close to anyone as close as i felt to her,
and i'm okay with that because what we had was something that i've never seen,
not even in the movies.
it's starting to feel like you were never here.
the one that kept everything together.
i'm addicted to the sadness.
it seems like all i can write about is you,
i'm starting to forget the color of your eyes,
how warm your hands were,
the sound of your voice.
going back to you now would make me seem like a fool and my pride seems to not back down so until then,
until i give in,
i miss you.
i'm sorry i'm not as interesting or energetic as i was two years ago or on my good days that i have sometimes.
things just don't feel right but without you both
i have no one.
i will be no one.
no matter how many times you'll tell me i matter or that you love me,
i can't see it,
i can't feel it.