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Late night thoughts
Of someone who isn't you.
Am I moving on, I wonder?
February 18, 2017.
I'd always thought I had more self respect
Than to let someone touch me when I didn't want them to
But I realize now it's not really about self-respect
Not with who I am right now
Because when you're not living for yourself-
Or, let me rephrase that,
You care for other people, so you haven't killed yourself-
You get out of practice with saying what you want
No matter whether you love who you are or not

I want you to stop touching me, it's starting to bother me, to eat away at my happiness before I sleep at night

Some part of me is still the princess
It's how I survive the dark, I play the ultimate innocent part
Trying to be perfect, polite, and kind
I don't want to make you feel bad or apologize
Self-sacrificing
Controllable

It comes down to how controllable I can be
Whether I can make the words fall off my tongue, for myself
Or whether I will bite them off before they begin, for you

*Life for yourself, as quick as you can
It only gets harder the farther away you get
Breaking down crying
For the third ******* time in
Three days. Please help me.
February 17, 2017.
In Nebraska, they are murdering transexuals
those with necks red as blood and lipstick
     This recording is the last of the words which are me
     -Play on the air for all to hear
or smash them between these two bricks
these two red bricks of earth and stone
     In Nebraska, they are murdering transexuals
which you may think is funny
when their lipstick gets smeared ridiculously
across the macadam
until you see their blood the same as yours
until they come for you
those "good old boys" with fists like bricks
and necks engorged with hate and spit
warm beer, **** and vinegar
sun beating down on their angry, little brains
 
     This is the final transcript
of all that I am
embellished with sequins and such
scrawled in *****
     These words are my lover's breaths
floating in darkness above cold ears
lost in cartoon-balloon blurbs
a drama of gasps
a flurry of snow and chipped nails
upon the pavement
across the prairie
in Nebraska
I wrote this when much younger and so I hope that it is not too dated, for those in the know. It was in response to some tragic news story of the time. This poem was previously published in my book"A Deep, Blue Dreaming (Magick Boy's Lost Episodes)", by Shivastan Publishing.
 Feb 2017 Gregory Dun Aer
Emily B
My anger is showing.

The capitol is full
Of treason and misogyny.

Pressure is building.
Boiling hot lava
Could erupt.

And I'm just over here
Making lard and yarn.
Not necessarily in that order.

I guess it is a good thing
That i wasn't made
winged and fire-breathing.

Just trying really hard
Not to destroy
Anything
In my path.

— The End —