Pushing you up against the nearest wall with the devil in my eyes
Kissing your lips and your neck
You forgetting your name
Quiet moans that I take from you
Sliding your hands up and down my body as you kiss me back just as passionately
You miss her
Forget your ex
I’m here with you in the moment  
Forget your religion
God can’t save you from the demon possessing me
All you want is me and I consume all of your thoughts
It’s not love but it’s close enough.

I have never met someone who has had similar experiences
I am sure they are out there
I feel so deeply that they mean something
but then i have my doubts
my dreams stay with me
even after the details fade
the feelings burn holes into my soul
The soul is something so deep
so protected
so untouchable
dreams penetrate directly to my soul
I fear it because I cant even reach my soul
I cant touch it
cant control it
cant protect it
thats why they are so confusing
sometimes I have dreams that appear to play out my most needed fantasies
other times
They toy with my deepest fears and guilts in ways i have never imagined them before
some times i can steer them a different path as the night goes on

other times I am left with an evil menacing weighted fear
these nights i quickly forget what happened
but my soul takes days to recover

what is it?
is it me controlling this?
is it those who have passed trying to reach me?
is it demons toying with my soul before they finally steal it?

is it all three

what is this

graves are silent in passing;
stone withers like snow
cracked and weathered: the horizon
pales in shades of blue.

every birthday candle wish was a wish for love
for someone to see me and love me for it
but then i got a taste of a relationship

and from now on

every birthday candle wish will be for solitude
to remain alone and happy
because the taste i got was so sour

i ***** a little every time i think about it now

I gave you worth in my life,
while you thought of me
as a free item.
I was valueless,
and easily replaceable
by the next warm body
that entered the room.

Success is all he had
And hate was what it brought
Frenemies with smiles
All around your house
Perching your fortune as houseflies
The scramble stumble struggle  
That took you
To be a butterfly
Frenemies can
Make you turn larva
o-ver-night

her ring sits on the mantlepiece
worn thin on one side
that dull warm yellow
that gold sometimes takes on

i remember it cutting into my hand
as she held it tightly as we shopped
it was bright and shiny then

she used to wear it on her  longest finger
after dad left us, she left it off for awhile
and then wore it on the other hand

it was tight on her workworn hands then
she took it off again before she went into
this last home, but kept it locked in a security draw

now it sits on the mantlepiece, waiting
for me to find a safe place for it
for it is the little bit of my mother's spirit
that will one day be part of my son's  wedding ring,