i want to peel your skin back
and reveal your deepest sweetness.
to look at your veins
and memorize their paths.
maybe then i’d understand
why you are so rough on the outside.
it takes a lot of work,
digging your fingernails into the flesh,
pulling and pulling until you are bare.
but it is all worth it;
to visit your center,
to break past what conceals you,
and take you apart
slice by slice.

I'm sorry, mum
That you went through all that pain
To bring me into life
For me to just waste away
And wish I wasn't alive

Tired is an emotion,
It's a wavering between sad,
And paranoid.
Exhausted because you couldn't sleep,
You were worrying about everything,
About her, about you, about life, the future too.
You keep worrying,
Until you pass out from lack of sleep,
And not even writing helps.
Because there's nothing to write about,
You feel the same every passing day,
But you can't write the same thing for days in a row.
New work, is there new work?
I'm working on it,
Drowning in thoughts,
Wish I could drown it out,
I can't out-think myself.
Though I wish I could,
My mind is a faucet,
But there's no turning it off.

He told me
"What's not to love?"

It's more of a
"Whats not to hate?"

I Dug Myself A Grave
And Lay Down in It
I Shovelled back the Dirt
And now I Am Finished
It felt So Good
To Be Part of the Earth
It was all Downhill
From the Moment of My Birth