There isn't a person,
I can call.
Scrolling down my contacts,
This lonely pain worsen.
There is something,
Wrong with me.
When they look at me,
What do they see.
If I could only know why,
What makes people leave me with no goodbye.

Lonely is my reality,
That Im living.
I don't go on social media,
Because I suddenly get,
A bad case of schizophrenia.
Its the perfect pill to make me,
Hate myself.
So I deleted it,
To sober myself.

If it wasnt for music,
Ill probably die,
Liquor is my favorite high.
To mask my lonely,
I let the cognac numb me.
After three glasses,
Im feeling happy.
Hidden from my lonely.

I hurt so much,
Not even the burn from whiskey makes me flinch.

Lonliness is food to my depression,
Having the perfect meal,
To fulfill its obsession.
Eating away my heart,
Pulling my nerves so I fall apart.

Peoples image of me kills me,
Because of what they choose to see.
I've tried opening up,
Only to be beat down with no,
apology.
I always felt like my feelings,
meant nothing.
Their words assure me it will,
never be something.
Im constantly being controlled,
By what they think is right.
Dare I be me,
My feelings would take a bad bite.
My whole life feels like I'm living,
In an asylum. 
And I'm suffering in silence

My therapist asked what am I,
Tryna hide.
I tried to answer,
But instead I cried.
My therapist asked again,
I stay quiet,
So I’m not condemned.
My therapist stayed quiet,
Until I couldn’t fight it.
I don’t want to sound like I’m complaining,
But ill get explaining.

One glass is all it takes,
To numb the pain.
Two glasses is all it takes,
To stop the tears from falling again and again.
Three glasses is all it takes,
To hold up what I cant contain.
Four glasses is all it takes,
To ignore my current mistakes.

Rejection after rejection,
I cant face it.
I feel wasted,
frustrated.
They say don’t get aggravated,
Stay motivated.
Get situated.
The fight isn’t over,
You cant be defeated.
I don't believe it.

Im not getting any grey hairs,
Worrying about what you think of me.
I usually keep myself up nicely,
But sometimes Im carefree.
Your comments go through one ear out the other.

If you don't like me now,
I promise you wont like me later.
While you stuck in the past,
Im moving on to something greater.