My beauty,
Through and through.
What I would do,
Just for you.
I would walk the mountains,
To save your life.
Sacrifice mine,
To keep you alive.
I would stop the pain
You feel each day.
Take the bullet,
To keep you safe.
As my love for you,
Darling,
Shall never stray.

I cannot breathe,
My lungs are weak.
Tears sink
Softly down my cheek.
This isn't me,
My speech is bleak.
Shaking so badly
On my seat.
Oh doctor,
Please doctor,
What could this be?
He mutters a word
Too familiar to me.

Anxiety.

Here I sit,
Restless.
These echoes,
Relentless.
Shame
Crawling through my veins.
Leaving a mark
On my withered brain.
Too spiteful to care
For my weakened frame.

For I
Shall choose myself to blame.

I am weary,
Though not for sleep.
This yawn
Means something more deep.
And I fear,
In my rest.
Body tosses
Through unmade sheets.
Yet I wake,
Instead.

As the cycle repeats.

Here I stand.
And though I land
With a thump and thud,
Little whispers
Fill me with love.

And these little voices,
Replicate mine.
As love of others
Was difficult to find.

Yet I do not mind,
No not at all.
For love of oneself,

Is better
Then none at all.

I envision a dream,
Created by me.
Of a boat floating
Along a gentle sea.
No waves to see,
Nor fish I seize.
Just one with myself,

And finally at ease.

In my world,
There is black and white.
Lots of fights,
Continuous cries.

But that's okay.

I get my paints,
And color the greys.
Turn white to yellow,

And finally create.