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Jonas Sep 2022
A man waks his dog down the street

watch me dump ****
let's worship each other
Jonas Aug 2023
I have a natural talent for causing chaos,
causing mayhem
A masters degree in clumsiness,
Been practicing it my hole life really

All those white shirts stained
right after the first bite
Eating my meals next to the plate,
glass shards shattered on the floor
Freshly opend cans filled to the rim flooding over
The sock that fell into the tea
The locked doors and forgotten details,
tokens, mementos left behind

Corners and doors hugging me tight on my way out,
a quick stabbing pain,
it's pull not push
Appointments lost cause I got it wrong,
wrong time, wrong place
the ungathering

Even more so when I'm tired or put on the spot
the chaos of first meetings, first dates spilling out into the world

Arrogance is not an option
for me
luckily,
this disposition of mine
keeps me sane, keeps me humble

It grounds me
this constant pull of gravity.
Jonas Jan 2022
I really wish I could cry sometimes, you know
For my on sake, not that of others
Be it real or fictional

I have a hohle in my tummy, my chest
and it's aching
aching
aching

If I had someone, if I had you
to hold me close at night or day
If you would be mine, and I would be yours
Could you save me?
Or would I just drag you down with me?
Into the mud
Jonas Feb 2021
Aufstehen, von der Sonne geweckt

der erste Kaffe steht bereit
Katzen die sich in Gärten strecken
du liest ein Buch, das tu ich auch
die Hängematte, schwingt zwischen den Tannen
Tauben zirpen, Zickarden gurren
dein Eis schmilzt und tropft
sonnengebleichte Haare steht in die Richtung des Windes
braungebrannte Haut schwitzig, später salzverkrustet
Sonnencremduft, an uns
Pommes rotweiß an den Fingern, klebrig
die Sonne blendet, ist  schon okay
Wellenrauschen, tobende Kinder kreischen
Sand zwischen den Zehen
du neben mir auf dem Handtuch
gemeinsam dösen
gehen wir nochmal rein?
Gösser, der letzte Schluck
ein bisschien zu warm
Dämmerung Barfuß auf dem Fahrrad
Lagerfeuerrauch in Augen und Nase,
blaue Flamme Knack zisch
weinrotgefärbte Lippen, Zungen so schwer wie der Kopf
Zeitlos

Bis morgen!
Jonas Mar 2023
The first rays of warm sunlight
on your skin
after the winter break.

Feels like a warm embrace
when your body is starved of touch.

Hints of fresh air
as petals blossom
and the sea water starts warming up.

Let's meet,
Let's revel
Oh to live again.
Jonas Apr 2022
she jumped from the coffins lying in the window screen,
death casually says hello,
while we're strolling through the city
,
but when it comes knocking for real,
racing right up to her,
she stays still.
Jonas Aug 2023
Growing up
I didn't believe them when they said kindness
be'd strength
I always took it for weakness,
for vulnurability
Leaving yourself open like that ...
it's just asking to get used and hurt.

But how can it be weak
when you're facing viloence head on
with a gentle smile on your face
calmly
standing steady against the storm
Your feet buried in the ground
stubbornly saying
"I will not budge,
I will not be corrupted by your petty anger"

When you choose to stay kind
against the odds and bad experiences
You'll have to sacrifice, take hits
Again and again

Against spite and ignorance,
arrogance and self pity
Often standing alone
without much support or empathy
Cause people are scared and hide away
Compromising to avoid conflict

In a society of mistreated souls,
of misunderstandings
where we just keep lashing out and passing the blame,
the responsibility
A couple animals locked in the zoo
who can scream the loudest?

Here it is that I choose
to stay kind
Jonas Jul 2024
Skin on glass
Day dreaming, I'm not sleeping
Enough
Sweaty ***, another train ride
Downtown  
I get up in the morning
To late, to bad
Coffe  
Bad times
Continue to frown

I feel like I've grown
Up,  a little after all
In time, still always to late for the call
Missed so many meetings, opportunities
You
Are you still up, still there
For me?

What is it all for
What's the point
Where did I go wrong?
Exit the lane at the turnaround

The pain and the struggle
The everyday hustle
Wearing clean, white silk on a ***** body
***** mind
Filled with garbage to the rim
Hit me baby, one more time

That ***** needs some pounding
Feel me, fill me out
I'm empty and worn, all bottomed out
Choke till I blush red for you
Like I used to, back then
When things still ment something
To me, to us
Give me a good reason why breathing feels so hard now

One more day
And then I'll wake up
My life is the dream that I am living
I've never been in control of my dreams
Jonas Dec 2022
A women is standing in front of a tree in the  melting snow.
It's already dark.

On one branch sits a ginger cat with an blinking collar
Looking away provocatively .

Both are completly motionless as you walk by.
You smile.

Arguing with cats is like arguing with time.
Jonas May 2024
I'm so sick of it

Sick of all the insecurity
Sick of being silent and invisible
Of being used and exploited
Just another number in some system
That I grew into
Sick of being forced to do things
That are "mandatory"
But without reason or logic behind them
Outdatet
Sick of being taken for granted
All the disrespect
I'm sick of nodding along, being understanding
I want to be done with it

But can't get out of my skin
Not for long
Not running on a dead line or anything
But I'm feeling like I'm running out of time
I'm missing out on so much
Again no better yet still
I can feel it slipping through

So I go away
Looking for a better place
For me, to stay
Look for people who care, who appreciate me
And know how to show it
Maybe
One day I can call a place my home
One day
It's gonna be okay
Jonas Mar 2021
.
inaudible screaming
what a beautiful subtitle
you can see the absence of sound
and yet hear it in your chest
bursting out
.
Jonas Sep 2023
What is it about freckles
about cute cuts and tops,
about sunflowers and pastel colours?

Green, blue, brown, yellow and grey
and everything in between
staring into your eyes, mesmerized

What about shapes and curves?
Up, down, in and out
you caught my attention
in a net of your facets

What is it about your scent, your expressions
your smile, your laugh
that makes me chase you?
Act fool

I keep replaying our moments together
when we aren't
together
chasing you in my mind
Until next time

What is this magic
that makes me ignore all my principles
risk my safety, my freedom
for nothng but a possibility
mere chance?

Let's find out, let it play out

I'm doomed but that's okay
if only I can be near you again
Lay down in your arms,
at least for a little while.
Jonas Oct 2023
Why does it feel like,
I have to fight off the world
and my body at the same time,
all the time?

Aren't we supposed to be allies
in this?
And why do I feel so alone
doing so?

I would give everythig right now
to be
nothing, no one
let go of my identity

Listening to circadas humm
lying in the shade of an apple tree
feel how the ground refelcts the heat
of the sun

Nothing left in my mind,
a steady merry heartbeat
as I drift away into slumber

No reponsibility
just peace of mind
and my chest so warm,
filled with wonder

I am free
Jonas Jan 2024
Today is a good day,

I've been touched by the sun
I am filled with light
Resonating the warmth
Jonas Jan 2024
You could smell the sun rising
Before the first rays touched you
Before the light reached you
To chase away the stifness in your joints
The coldness in your bones

An open promise
Of warmth spreading back into the world
Chasing away the dark,
Bringing back it's colour
Once more

I open up my mind
Let in a little light
Breathe deep
To feel alive again
Jonas Jun 2023
Working in gastromony taught me some things
in life
everything gets more intense

when you add a little salt

:)
Jonas Jul 2021
Somedays
I fall out of time
and have to force my way back
crawl to the surface
of this demanding reality
Jonas Jan 2022
Funny,
how all I need to forget myself,
forget my troubles

Is to hear you chuckle
hear you moan

with me.
Jonas Apr 2021
"I'll love you till the end of time babe"
Time is nothing but a human construct to deal with reality.
It's fictional.
"I promise you the world."
Don't give promises that you can't keep.
Besides what am I to do with the world? Watch it burn?
"Okay, I'll hold you through the night at least."
You'll suffocate me.
"You're so irritating, what do you want?"
Drop the *******.
"Okay ..."
I want you to punch me in the face.
"What...?"
Softly.
With your lips
slams him into the wall
.
Who run the world?
Jonas Mar 2024
Open status window
Open inventory
Reapply stat points
Report error
Debug

Start a new journey
Override safe files

Do you want to continue?
Log out
Jonas Feb 5
Du lachst
Die Erde brennt
Quatsch tut sie gar nicht!
Das ist eine Verschwörung der Milchbauerverbände
Check deine Fakten!
"Ich höhr prinzipiell jedem zu"
Demokratisch gewählt heißt legitimiert
Kann gar nicht falsch sein
Geh mal weg mit 1933, oder doch 1984?

Du lachst
Die Wälder rauchen, husten nur noch
Alle Spezies sind tot bis auf zwei
Gut
Passt so auch besser in ein Kinderbuch
Nicht zu viel Diversity
Das sexualisiert unsere Kinder

Du machst
Nichts mehr
Was willst du schon tun kleiner Mann?
Molotovs bauen lernen?
xD
Schade um den Alkohol
Mach dir lieber noch ein Bier auf

Kann man nichts machen
Ist eh zu heiß draußen um sich aufzuraffen
Noch ein wenig Geschichten erzählen, gemeinsam
Von jetzt ist die Zeit und es ist noch nicht zu spät
Jeder Zyniker weiß längst
Aufwärts geht's nur im Telefon
Weißer Screen im schwarzen Raum
Was sind schon verschenkte Stunden in einer kaputten Welt?

Du weinst
Nicht mehr
Schon lange nicht mehr
Wann war das letzte Mal?
Der Blick ins Leere, endlich taub
Und nichts tut mehr weh

Nehmt mir alles was ich habe
Noch mehr Müll für mein Gehirn bitte
Im 10 Sekunden Format

Zu Letzt geht die Hoffnung
Schwimmen
Ertrinken im Mittelmeer
Jonas Apr 2022
Chain me up,
clutch my wrists,
and hold me down.

Hold me tight.
Show me you care,
show me I matter.
Jonas Jul 2024
Did you know?
Octopuses change colour when they sleep
Are you dreaming little guy?
And they punch other fish from time to time
Dolphins and elephants give each other names and orcas have regional accents
Crows never forget a face
Cats see us as  other ver big, very clumsy cats
Otters have a favourite rock and hold hands
And baby giraffes rely on the impact of the ground to draw their first breath?
And fcking platypuses dude?
That time and space has to be totaly different for an animal with a strong sense of smell such as dogs because when you're out of sight you're still very near to them?

Did yo know?
Vegetables don't exist in botany
That the maps they taught us in school are a lie
Distorted in scale from the truth, making the US and Europe look bigger?
That almost all 21 century communication technology has origins in the scientific attempt to communiticate with the lost dead in a grief struck world after the first world war?
That history is just a story full of cover ups and holes?
That Australians veterans lost their war with an emu overpopulation in 1932?

We now have 7139 languages alive in the world
The one with the most words is Korean,
The one with the fewest is Toki Pora which communicates in concepts
That we different from 23 emotions in humans and asthetic appretiation is one of them?
Just because they're there doesn't mean we feel them
No wonder communication is so hard

A world where grown man long for tears like children jump in Puddles of rain fallen long ago (in their minds)
We're so ignorant to it all
And forget to quickly
Sometime whilst growing up we stop to wait and wonder
Make way, coming through, full speed ahead!
Think abot your future!
It's so horrible and beautiful at the same time
You're just another waling curiosity
What is consciousness and what has it done for you?
I another second you'll be gone
So worry less and move along
Jonas Feb 2021
How can you get success , love and happiness?
Strength!          [Why do you ask me that?]

What if you can't be succesful alone?
More Strength                                    [ pls...]

What if you need to accept weakness to love?
Grow stronger!                                 [stop it]

What if that doesn‘t make you …
STRENGTH!                                 [I can‘t ...]

You are none of these things are you?
Stop it!                               [ STRENGTHH!]
You‘re lost aren‘t you?
Help me ... I am broken       [I hate myself ]
Oh the irony ,when being weak and vulnurable takes the biggest strength.
Being brave does not mean acting without fear, it means acting despite of the crushing feeling of it.
Jonas Aug 2024
One day, at the children's faire
You find yourself stuck at the mirrors cabinett

Out of sight of your parents
You follow your friends
Walk beside them like you always did
But all of the sudden there is no room for you left besidse them
"Just have to walk behind them then"
You think

Spaced out for a moment
They just went straight ahead
In confindence and innocence, unbothered
But stepping where they stepped
You hit glass
"What's this now? I don't want this"
The road is blocked for you
While others just continue to walk on by

Your face, a slightly damp reflection
Shows suprise, anger and irritation
It looks scared
"Why can't I just go on, like they are?"

Okay then, you think
"I'll just have to find my own way now"
After taking a break
Crying and whining for weeks
"He missed school, whatever happend to him?
Let's write a get well soon card"
Getting further and further away from them
Being left behind really hurts
"Don't you love, me what did I do wrong?"

Sure you can call out, you can scream and shout
And struggle all you want
Adults have a word for that, he's "acting out"
Maybe some even will wait for you, for a while
Try to help and understand
The fewest do, and only for so long
They can offer you a hand
Before they have to turn away, go back to their own lifes
You're holding them back
Can't you see?

There is much excitement a little up the way
Once you're out of the labyrinth
Promises of popcorn and sugary delights
Of first nervous dates and bumpy faire rides
Blinking lights and short harmless frights
Nobody wants to stumble at the starting line
When it's about finishing the race in time

Life is decided in moments
A bag of decisions and "things that just happend to me"
To carry along, as long it's not to heavy
As long as it's not pulling you down
Deep underwater in darkness you will drown
Just struggeling to breathe normally
While watching others run marathons
From your enclosed space

Always watching your refelcetion in the mrror
Looking back at you, judging you
Which side is real?
Who hates whom more?
Try to ignore the panic building up inside
Transforming in time to fear, to anger, sadness,  self pity
To loneliness, hate and then just emptiness
Full cicle

Did you fail the game or did the game fail you?
For how long can you hold out, stuck in the same place
With nothing but promises and a hole in your tummy
Eating yourself up from the inside out?
Jonas Jan 2024
Chasing the shapes of the sand
Following the ways of the wind
Taking grains to the sky
In waterfalls
A gentle cutting
Persistantly reshaping
Sturdier than stone

A dead ocean of dirt and stone
Where an ocean once flew
It comes in shades of yellow, orange and red

Now I walk over the waves
Marked by sunlight and shade
I go where the wind writes it's whispers
Into the dunes
Going in lines
Curving forever and ever

I lose myself
In the silence
In the warmth and cold
Into the nothingness of the vast views ahead
The endless flow
Stretching out to the horizon
And further
Beautiful yet deadly if ever misstreated
Devastating if ever misunderstood
Jonas Sep 2022
I'm free falling
what a scary thought

imagine
hitting the ground without you
imagine
hurting you
Jonas May 2024
Bulgaria,
08.40,leaving from sector 2
You pay with the driver
You can stick your head out of the window
Watch meadows and cows pass by
Chewing in indifference

The market is every wednesday
I wish they'd lay better pavement
1kg and one apple please
We want to have a bbq later
In the rain
You fill my heart
But my tummy can't keep up

Sure, the Dixi is available
But there is always the option of being a friend of nature
And **** in the woods
The cave is one of the biggest in Europe
Which means
It's tall enough to fit a horse
He told me, holding hands with his wive
Of over 30 years
They wouldn't let me pay for the ticket

A day in the park
People are peopling
Yes that's a word, now
I'm people too
Yet it irritates me when they remind me
Here, I picked these daisies
Three of them, they're for you
Ne razbiram, sorry
Caho, chao!

Did you know?
The black sea is milky
And cold
Jonas May 2023
Hi mom,

Today I lived
today I felt the flowers bloom
I joined the birds in their celebration
with smoke and sunshine in the air
We danced trough the streets to any music we could find
And sometimes we just made our own
We fell from one encounter to the next
the stock exchange of kind words
Our Eyes, ears and hands never went lonely
always filled with wonder

Till the sun had enough and went
And the night covered us with it's veil of comfort and privacy
Turning words to whispers of wisdom
Turning grown man to infants again, resting all curled up
Voices reaching out, like skipping stones over the dark water beneath us.

I fell in love four times over today
In a look, a touch, a second
Each one a magical opportunity found, but then lost right away
The moment's passed, your friends are waiting

So many pretty people roaming the streets,
Little frog head I was to shy to talk to you
but maybe see you again? Next year same spot?
Where the flowers bloom and the people are dancing with food in their hands

Good night now Mama,
I want you to know, today I lived
Jonas Jun 2023
Listen,
I've been holding back my entire life
When we step into the ring
I want you to know I'm not gonna hold back anymore
And I expect you to match that.

So before you do step in
Make sure you hugged your mother,
told your women you love her,
showed her how much you worship her
and spend some time with your friends.
Real time.
The kinda time little girls and poets write about in their letters.
I'll make sure to do the same

Cause one of us might lose their life in there,
Blood, spit  and soul on leather,
The respect between caged animals.
Jonas Aug 2023
All those little scars and marks,
left scattered over your body ,
shaping you,
making you, you.
All those habits and traits
specifics of the people close to you
forming familiarity.

A scent , a gesture, a sound
can take you back to the past
to the company of loved ones.
A quick pain to the chest as a reminder

Nostalgia triggered like dandeion pedals surrend to the wind
before you know it they're gone, the moment's over
already fading away
Added to the great library of what came before,
categorized and stored,
prioritized by what's more important and what is less.
To gather dust,
be forgotten or altered by time.

It's so beautiful it breaks my heart.

So keep collecting your scars and marks,
while you're at it,
maybe you could leave some on me as well.
Jonas Dec 2023
...
The line?
Yes
No

What was it again?
Where did I begin?
"When ..."

****, ****, *******

Should have written it down
Jonas Oct 2023
One of humanities biggest flaw
might be
that we die to young
and forget to quickly

You spend all your life
figuring out who you are
where you belong
grasping for a purpose

Trying to figure out
your faults and problems
Are those yours
or just inheritance?

Trying to remember
what went wrong in the past
Clinging to a made up story,
half reinvented anyway
Trying to learn, to predict, to better yourself
to fix yourself

Reclaim what was lost
pick out
the good from the bad
what's to keep and
what must go

And then
after years of reflection,
of trial and error
when you finally feel like
you might have a clue
...

You're over
your body's beaten and sore
your time has passed
Your mind, your body, your soul
broken down, taken apart
rebuild over and over

Each time wearing thinner and thinner
all of your energy is gone,
invested and spend
in your pursuits
How noble

You might find yourself
trying to teach whoever's dear
what you've concluded
what you have learned.

They won't listen
just as you did
in the past

The rumbling of the old
is white noise to young minds
The loud silence of age
The wisdom in the pause
of important teachings
lost in thought

A flickering lamp
in the dark
on it's last breath
covered in dust

On it's last moments
surronded by nothing but moths,
misguided creatures
clinging to warmth, to the flame

Desperate to find a way,
to find rest
or maybe simply
not to be
alone.

Short lived lifes to an old one now lost,
and laid
to rest
Jonas Sep 2022
I don't care about anything
don't bother me
leave me alone

there will always be a little of that
left in me
my last resort
Jonas Jan 2024
Don't listen to the words
Listen for the meaning within
The intentions conveyed
Emotions quelled, bursting out
In a matter of melodic sounds

Behind curtains drawn
Before thick brick walls
Stacked high
Yet fragile
There they are waiting

Listen to all the noise
The whispers
Unspoken out loud
And you might gain
A piece of the puzzle

Rejoice
For the world lies before you
Like an open book
In a library of many more
It's secret yet to be discovered
Spread out before you are
All of it's wonders
Jonas Aug 2022
You said I'd be like a guardian angel,
to you
a knight in shining armor.
You trust me completly
You let yourself go

Please don't elevate me like that
Not when I could hit you
and you'd stay
stay still
stay still with me.

You don't have healthy boundries
at all
and how could you?
When no on ever taught you
taught you to care for you.

That power scares me
the power you give me over you
It acts corrupting
There is something rotten here
something you are yet to see
that you're slowly bringing out of me.

I keep it locked behind the curtains
of the stage we're acting on
We are comitted to our roles now
Hide and seek we play

I hide, you seek
all fun and games

Now
The make up is slowly  coming undone
We're spilling tears and sweat.
I sweat you cry.
I can't cry, you do it for me!

How much time is left,
till I get bored or you see me for me?
Jonas Jan 2024
A familiar scent
Welcomes me
In a strange country
Faced with it's workings
Unkown to me
Riddled thick with a language I don't speak

A sudden warmth
Comes over me
With the scent of summer
Carried in a breeze
Craddling me
Making me feel at home
Here

As the wind blows by
The moment passes
I close my eyes
And at last
I can fall
Asleep
Jonas Feb 2021
rats fleeing through sewers
screeching in vain
blood dripping from cut after cut
paper thin pain

the swelling sobbing thunder
louder than ever
ringing the bells
from the highest tower torn asunder

tears crashing
lighting strikes again and again
a mother's inaudible cry
for her baby boy
time gone by
dead in pointless struggle

for that too is part of life
never forget my friend
happiness is a privilege
I'll leave you with that
- the end -
Jonas Mar 2023
Runners high
out of breath, muscles aching
when I managed to get up, get out get by.

And left my room

The sun shining on my face
pulling you closer to my chest
a summer affair's embrace.

It's warm

When my music resonates
sounds make up my brain
and my heart beats to the rhythm
Here's to another day, my fellow inmates.

All is fine in the world when drowned out.

Looking out the window of a moving train
the landscape's rushing by
Get some distance, might not feel the pain
at least not for a while

Reset my settings.

When you tell me I'm enough,
I'm doing fine
I imagine

I've never heard these words spoken before
Jonas Aug 2024
Get your knives out
Get your grandads pitchforks
Today we march and march
No more benefit of the doubt
They had it coming, they did
With all their lies spread around
Can't trust the media
Get your facts straight, check your sources

Time to carve, time to shout
We'll be heard, we'll be loud
For love, for peace, for the motherland
To right past wrongs
Against the pale opression
We do it for the kids

Get up, get out
We hit the streets tonight
Dig in lemming before you starve
It's time to follow the one true voice
In darkness we walk
Eyes shut, don't look up
Only kick down, push back left and right

Listen only to the voice
Everyone else is lying to you, using you, manipulating bunch
Fella can't even say what he thinks anymore
Around these parts
We'll make it right

So only trust me, all you have to do is
Follow, don't think
Do as I say, jump Simon says
Off with ya, off the cliff
Have a nice flight
Make out a way for me
To walk upon
Piled up lifes, a mountain of bodies

So I'll get out
Richer still
Pawn to E4
#Atruebeliever
"Necessary sacrifice"

Don't forget to pick up my dry cleaning
Jonas Oct 2023
Give me a break,
please
I don't want to function anymore,
all the time

A release from the pressure,
the constant demand for more
do more, be more
always wrong somehow,
in so many ways

A long, good rest
to lift the stress
from my shoulders

So I can breathe,
I can live
freely
Take my time
out

Come out
afresh, relaxed
on the other side
Drowned out the noise
for a while
from one quick eternity to the next

I step out again
into the world
looking forward
just bending not breaking
reshaping

Eyes and ears open,
lifitng my gaze
now I am ready
now I can go on
Jonas Apr 2022
Makes me want to swallow a gun,

pull the trigger til the chamber is empty.
Jonas Mar 2024
I'm a starving dog
Throw me a bone
I'll choke on it

Bear with me
Watch me
See me

Hear me
Roar
Jonas Sep 2022
When a train runs by you
at top speed

You feel the urge
feel the pull
towards disaster

My are thoughts are with my head tonight
lieing on the tracks
Jonas Mar 2023
Some gems are lost forever
sparkle
never to be found

Maybe that's for the better
Jonas Jun 2022
Gotta keep busy
gotta work hard
keep my mind clouded, foggy, and dizzy
no room left for thoughts to start.

Burn myself out
so I won't go crazy
with these thoughts getting loud
my mind's staying hazy.
Everday I spend my time, getting high , drinking wine, feeling fine kinda vibe
U7
Jonas May 2024
U7
Excuse the staring
I wanted to be seen
By you
Beautiful

When I help people I don't feel
Invisiable
Just for a moment
A beggar swinign an empty cup
That hasn't seen coffee in a long time
Any spare change?

Don't look up now
Careful
We might lock eyes
You'd be forced to accept
And recognize
That I am still human too
Like you
Draw out the empathy
Cause despite it all you still care
You tried so hard not to
I know, it's not fair

You see now
It's always in the eyes
Where the soul resides

So careful now
Don't look up
Jonas Mar 2024
Dear
Please
Don't moan into my ear
Stop kissing my neck
I have to get this done
I'm trying to concentrate here

Oh well
It's to late now to stop
Look what you've done
Come here
Jonas Aug 2023
Isn't it hilarious
how you can spend a lifetime

without ever beeing noticed?
Jonas Apr 2021
Missing out or
being left beind
which is worse?




As if you had the choice ...
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