Dear heart,

Why is it taking so long to heal?
How come pain is the only emotion you feel?
Deeply yearn to feel whole once more
Happy like I was before
I write my issues to soothe my stress
But it doesn't matter how much I confess
Person after person waltzes into my life
Then with no warning cuts our tether with a knife
While I watch frozen as if in a trance
Fed up with those who don't bother to give me a chance
I am dedicated and gentle towards who I care about the most
Yet cannot prove it because no one dares to get close
Of course know everything happens for a reason
But ponder what it is as I wait season after season
I am grateful you are still here despite being shattered
Taken many beatings that have left you bruised and battered
I try to find something to replace the emptiness inside of you
But that's the type of thing that is easier to say than do
And every time I am tempted to kiss remaining hope goodbye
Your stubborn voice reminds to give it one more try
I admit that sometimes I wish you would stop speaking
But despite my requests you carry on beating
On the wings of hope my negativity lifts
The rhythm you keep in time surely shifts
From a suffering slow thump
Feeble and weak
To an even-paced pound proving impressive technique
Allowing love to enter as you open up wide
Warming my being completely inside
Pain and sorrow still inhabit my soul
But I sense they are beginning to relinquish control
Life has a lot of good to balance out the bad
You are helping me see that I can overcome what makes me sad
Every small blessing you bring to my attention
Miracles that before were beyond comprehension
So this is to say thank you for opening my eyes so I can see
The beauty that surrounded all along
I'm forever grateful heart

Love,
Me

She is doing kind of **** I would never do
It genuinely hurts to see the way she's treating you
Back when mine I treated you as if you were my king
Looks as if in her mind you are nothing more than a fling
I try to hide disapproval because I don't have the right
To tell who is and who isn't worthy of holding you so tight
But is hard to witness you take any amount of abuse
Emotional and physical
You refuse to cut her loose
Does it seem I am simply sipping on some haterade?
Opinion formed without even giving you a chance to persuade
In gut instinct churns that she will run once more
What is stopping her now that wasn't in the way before?
Despite previous cold shoulder you dove right back into her (eye-see)icy sea
You really believe she changed overnight into the woman you need her to be
Suspicions
Concerns
Questions swarm my confused mind
You chase what does not care and leave who loves you behind
Rushing to her side again the moment you get the chance
When she pushes away I'm sure you'll repeat the dance
At worst I threw some punches when I lost control of my fist
Appears violent tendencies are something she doesn't bother to resist
I hope under covers she at least warms your body at night when it's late
Waking up by you privilege missed most so I pray that one blessing she appreciates
I wish her to hold you down whether doing good or bad
Because I supported through struggles no matter how little you had
She better carry more weight than I could to help relieve your heavy load
Demonstrating far greater strength then the pathetic bit I showed
Inevitably she will grow tired of the endless games and lies
Wonder how much manipulation she'll endure before she will finally cave and realize
I had given up on promised transformation and pushed for solely honesty
Something tells me she is not capable of accepting that this is all you'll ever be
She does a more adequate job than me at being everything you desire
Does a word exist describing the qualities I lack which you require?
Inside is excruciating knowing you have discovered happiness with someone new
In presence underneath maintained composure visciously longing to fall for anyone other than you
Unsure how much misery must drown in before loneliness finally sets me free
Maybe it is time to admit that this cage my heart is locked within was created with no key