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Amanda Kay Burke Sep 2021
Far far across acres of wild land
Distance fades touch of your hand
I visit you in my dreams **** near every night
In your absence just doesn't feel right
Don't know why continue clutching onto yesterday
Will hold back the words I want to say
Twisting painfully
Constricting my chest
Digging deeper longer they are suppressed
Forcing me to fight for every breath of air
Heart pounding as muscles tear
I love you through the blood and heartache
Always love who you are
Asleep
Awake
We drift out with tides
Stranded somewhere at sea
In the waves of everything we can't be
Floating atop oceans of tears you made me cry
All you've done
Explain to me why..
Amanda Kay Burke Sep 2021
Obstacles impossible to pass
Each time I try I end up falling on my ***
Is there point to all the madness I face?
I fear that is not the case
Those walls in my way keep getting higher
I'll run out of steam and my body will tire
Frightening shadows chase from behind
Manifested from darkest corners of my mind
Things worsen
I start losing my breath
If I cannot catch it I may be caught by death
You don't know how close you are to permanent sleep
Until feeling the icy fog into your senses creep
See hurdles in the distance as I move
But hindered by flaws I can't remove
When will I be ambitious enough to succeed?
See results for all these drops I bleed?
You have no clue
Hard I have strived
To thrive
Only managed to survive
Take burdens and try to throw them out
They won't let me live without
Your will only is as strong as your mind
Seems to giving up mine is hopelessly resigned
Eyes set on victory but will not stay trained
Halfway they already feel strained
Off course veer
Terrible navigation
Still carry on in vain due to obligation
Terrified of letting down dearest to my heart
Wishing for a way I could go back and restart
But life is not a movie you can pause and rewind
With control buttons was not designed
Goal after goal watch myself throw away
Promising I'll get my **** together someday
Amanda Kay Burke Sep 2021
It sure was a strange sensation
Loneliness struck like ice
There can't possibly be justification
Putting me through this twice

With one highway between us
Never seemed so long
Steel door is locked leading to trust
It is unbreakable and strong

Every time walk the line
Carefully between give and take
I would stand up for myself if I had a spine
Order to clean up messes you make

Fear keeping paralyzed
Cannot move or make a sound
About time I realized
No longer want me around
Amanda Kay Burke Sep 2021
What is expected from me?
You were the half that chose to leave
I'll do my best
Be your friend
Even if leading to another dead end
Never thought we would wash up where we are
Two separate shores
Watching you from afar
Be truthful with me
That is what I most desire
Sick of the games
Frustrated
Tired
Fake way through a familiar apology
Promising to be the man I know you'll never be
Like a rolling dice
Have many faces
Expert at bluffing yet you're always holding aces
You gamble my love
About time you lose
My heart not an object to pull apart or use
I'm sick of betting my chips
The poorest hand
For you I go all-in
Don't even understand
I never was good at cards
At least that is what I'm told
Probably should cut my losses
Say farewell and finally fold
But what can I say? I guess I'm just a gambling type of girl...
  Sep 2021 Amanda Kay Burke
Kelsey
I ventured into the depths of my unruly heart to find the words that tasted like honey at sunrise.
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