I'd put a bullet in my head if I didn't have
A trigger  for a spine

Please **** me

Why is the pain not gone

Why do I still feel like

all  the goodness in my life

Left

When  you pulled the knife   from his flesh

And twisted it into my back

Chest ache
Heart break
God I'll take no more

Head ache
For heavens sake
I cant take no more

You do it for fun
Just brag and then run
I know  your just his *****

So have your fun
I'll  stroke  this gun
And eagerly await
The gore

Heave
To and fro
Pull
Back and forwards.
Cut
Side to side
Jump
Up then so far down

Leave
I'm not worth being  around

I sat down to write about how you made me feel, Funny,   I thought something indescribeable  would be easy to explain

For the longest time I was In a dark place. With weights of lead bound around my heart. The inside of my skull became  walls that I was forced  to scream at  my flesh  was a barrier to letting the happyness out, my fingers   gripping cold steal triggers trembling pleading to let the grey  matter out
To decorate the walls in my own shade of misery.  
But I'm here
Breathing

It's strange,  for a boy who never leave his room. To sit Under his washing line and listen to the birds  sing. I lie on butter cups as I watch clouds dart between wire and cotton, how did I get here?
What God did I pray too?
Who did I pay?

When my world  was over. My pistol In my hand. You happened.
The cloud that had allways sat just out of sight came running. Galloping . To give me water.  To give me life,

A blue eyed blonde haired mirror of myself emerged,
Your smile Is warm. And kind. Like the evening sun I write this in,
Your touch was wholesome. And craved, you took the freyed edges of the tapastry that had become  my life and started to spin a new story. You took the lead weights  from my heart and melted them  into sinkers so we could catch stories with our fingers,  your skin felt like silk that I could never afford.
With each step  you danced on egg shells as you try  collect my broken pieces
And when a part of my was missing you filled it with a part of you. And now I find myself intertwined.
Here in this warm glow I notice something I've never had before.
The voices In my head have  stopped chiming.  The cries are far away.
Your gifts  have  not stopped coming.  I pray your here to stay
In less time then anyone has ever been in my life you have done so much more,   in less time then it took to knock me down you've built me into something more
I'll never forget the way I feel right now, here. Today.
Because each and every time I see you.
I know I'll stay this way

Death defy
Flying high
How hard  is it to touch the ground
Ill step of the edge and fall upwards
As my body plumits down
No longer will i be around,
Ill not even make a sound