doth hate yourself ***,
for an *** with mind is still an ***
flaunting about the property of knowlege,
like every little gasp, saves you from laughing stock
***

doth Bring yourself justification
for beeing such an ***'
and though you seem a *****,
my lady your still a lass


So bring to me the right kind,
of liquid, intoxicating
and sit back and smile, as i lie here,
procrastinating

Debits on the left credits on the right
balancing such wastefull transactions
debits on the left credits on  the right
hating myself for youthful actions
debits on the left credits on the right
Who told you about job satisfaction?

Lack of communication
is an accurate definition of my miss representation

Lack of medication
redirects my mass infection reaping the nation

lack of effective meditation
re infects my self designed disease facing annihilation

lack of representation
forcing myself to find a new nation

barriers affect communication

I usually write about pain because of the absence of happiness
now im going to write about pain because of the absence of you

suffering through negligible tasks like floating through a school day
both feet in the air gliding past my peers without a care
I'm numb you know, from the excruciating agony of knowing your not here with me,
I'm crippled with the guilt of knowing that you  feel the same because of me
you should let me love you more, you have no idea what affects you have on me,
glee rolled in ecstasy
fun double dipped in happiness
joy twice fried  in cute and once in trust
you have changed me, I never thought I could love anyone like you
and now look,
I'm loving you,
hearts thumping
like a good remix two songs merge into one
Mad love'

Most of the time I write about pain,
but right now
I want to write about you

Where does this zero go?
when is it o.k to say yes or no?
my transactions arent lining up
and my expenses have run amuck
and i think my buisness has  gone to ****
i think that i am out of luck

If You where ice cream
and i was the sun
We wouldn't have much fun,
I think you'd Run
and even though it hurt you,
I'm sure you'd love me all the same,
You'd love me even more
if the ground was flooded by rain
because after the clouds parted
and my beams graced you once more
I'm sure you'd find us both, dripping onto the floor

Decrepid
I watch you spy their futures
Scooping dreams with sillky fingers
Far too frail to dig,
Fear not,
The sweat from my brow will bring us life.
Sustaining and sweet
Care not,
Though you can not see them.
The huming birds sing

Im confuddled.
Confused
Bemused

Im in love  with you,
So tender and true,
A love as old as time
But still it feels so new

Im learning  every day and night
What monsters keep you up at night
I think i know how to hold  you right

And keep you so amused

Im fearful that ill loose your  attention.
Im terrified of the things i best not mention
But if i do one thing right in my life.

It would be staying with you. My love.
My life

Add me to the list of show horses who've kissed a gun

I'm tired of beeing the beaten one.
No fun.

Sick of beeing the last man to run
I feel like eventually I'll amount to someone
But till that day I'm just a body.
My sports have become  hobies
Sleeping in hotel lobies.
Giving gobbies for coins
There is no fruit in my *****
Just an ache that lies in the wake of my discrimination.
Acting alongside my procrastination
No longer will my forehead bead with
Precipitation

I have become a man that could disappoint a nation

Choke,
Cough
Splutter
Crash test pilot  diving through clutter
My brakes  dont work
But im running out of gas anyway
The pills dont work
But i drank all my water yesterday
Starved of thought
To hungry to thirst
Im feeling like today cannot get any worse

uncurl from your ball child
wipe away those soot laden tears
welcome to the new world
where all is here to fear
sons of the apocalypse she wailed
bow down to your fears
welcome to the new world she wailed
welcome to the fear
welcome to the chaos that i have brought so near
uncurl from your ***** you men
bastars filled with shame
bring forth your sins,
and i shall give them names
Crawl out of your festering holes,
and bring out the young
for a man will say anything,
when he stares down the barrel of a gun

so we came in great swavs
and brought forwards all our rot
and smiled as she told us
that the world would forget us not

This morning i had to wake up.
curled right next to you
bottoms gone tops my legs twisted around yours like red vines
the feeling sweeter then anything
you woke me with kisses,
soft as hershies
and i giggled bubbly like lemonade
i hope this feeling never fades
waking up
every morning
in sweet sweet love with you

Talk to me about indifference
Can anyone define it? Who defines ?
It’s a word we should understand clearly and fluently
Why? Well…Why not?
Because as humans, indifference is valued
Prized even
Genocide in Africa? I’m indifferent
Pity…
Poverty in our country? I’m indifferent
Pity…
Indifferent it is a word we should use so much more than we do
Indifferent to the screaming of my next door neighbours wife
Pity           …
OH Indifferent!  INDIFFERENT to the hallowed call of a child at the 6 o’clock news with a swollen belly and flies in his eyes
PITTY!
Indifferent to the passions of a man foresworn to his pride and under the influence refuses to admit to his shame!
BY GODS IM A ROBOT
Remove my emotional hardware its malfunctioning strip me of my programs their not the normal
Remove my speech circuitry I’ve been lying…
This hole time I swore closeness and collaboration..
Ideals you all share, seeing pain, listing to the agonising news off a car bomb in Syria! 118 dead! Thank god ill never meet them!
Did I know them? No? ! Well ill share a moment of agony and grief and then continue to buy slave made products and feed my mechanicals beasts with petroleum stolen from foreign lands !
I AM A ROBOT AND YOU ARE TO
Devour my heart it no longer beats, my eyes are desensitized, my spirit aghast at the agony of existing,
The high price of living I was told,
Stand fast and ready your ears like a galleon with no sails and receive the news of your defeat , or would you rather not be there to hear it?
It’s time to listen to the high price,
Social media seems to have developed unto me a craze for the worst ! ive liked pages that post videos of people killing themselves death fascinates me!
I have all of my needs catered for,  
have sources of entertainment
I have a job that allows me  to pillage part of the earth for my enjoyment
I have food that sustains me  and a group of robots that  I call friends, we share the same software  I can relate to them  via USB
And thus the only thing that excites me…that gets me going, that shakes my distraught existence is the thought of..not.
Of not existing
Indifferent..
Endure the agony of hearing that our own… brothers and sisters in humanity where killed,
Beings we share the same DNA for and beings we by some estranged number of generations are related to
Pretend to care for a moment
Indifference,
Watch my world ware thin
Watch my skin grow pale
Watch my organs fail
Indifferent.
Watch cancer take my loved ones
Watch fear destroy my hope
Alone I stand indifferent


Take me to emotion

This is not the way I was designed
The dull thud in my chest is not of rifle fire
Nor is it requisition of my life force of some higher being calling me home
No
It is the device that fights my indifference
It is the vessel that commands my soul to walk on broken glass
The dull thud It is the idea that in ideas we will never die , only grow as humans, within humanity
The dull thud ringing through my chest quickens  when I see you,
The dull thud dies down when I grow cold
It is not the pilot aimlessly guiding me through coordinates listed on a fact sheet like a tour guide
But it is the engine that drives me to aspire to be more, the location from witch I draw force, power,
I do not want to be a robot...  I never asked to be made of steel nor carbon nor sparks
An emotionless vessel to power through indignity and anxiety without a notion to an outsider,
Without consideration to feel
Without consideration to feel alive But sick…steel skin does not get ill without strain,
Steel skin does not grow pale or wither with age
The computer in my head will not fade with time
And my heart has never once stopped
I am not of robotics
I am not of steel
I am merely…
human
And I
Am not
Indifferent!
Scream to me the agony! AGH!  Genocide in Africa?  I will denounce myself to humanitarian work!
I will design my life to bring happiness and joy and inspiration to the masses! I will re-write the ground on which I stand in favour of my own desires!
Poverty in my country?! I will rise to be what is needed! And fall to be humbled!  I will writhe with angst until the government I serve hears my cries and writhes also! To change those laws written in stone and redefine what it is to be human! I will cry for every child living like a dog under the stars, under-influence and angry, because I am angry to!
The cries of my neighbor will be brought to append in front of a judge my community will whale together in her agony and burst forth with our love! we will provide! We will carry her down the streets and sing her name she is not a beaten dog but a queen of queens! As we deserve it!
I AM NOT INDIFFERENT
I am not of the programming I was designed,
Nor am I to append the functions I was written for
I am an arm that writes itself hole as it continues down the page..
I am not of machine
I am not guided by that actions of others
But I am the wholeness of myself
Though fractured I am pure,
Though ***** I am clean
Though broken I am definitively joyful.
I am not indifferent, and I will forever refuse to be so
Because if you take away my indifference…you bring me back
You will bring me back…to my humanity,

*L.G

Cotton soft and oh so warm
Here ill wait for bitting dawn,
For my bed is cold as winters night,
No comfort will i find tonight.

So you replied
after telling me not to
im sure you lied
but ive decided ive got to
find out why
otherwise ill rot to
i share no pain any more
i just wish we could be more
then enemies on the same playground
because this swing-set is to big for the two of us,
and i have reinforcements hanging on the monkey bars
the feelings arent their any more
but it doesnt mean you dont have to be

I haz only one favorite water bottle;
You.

An angel saw my ****
And told me god would forgive
And so i told the angel
If god could forgive me,
I would have wished to never live

Labour clenses
I sweat pure evil.
Lifting freight, peddling souls

No thank you
Im not climbing the ranks.
But slowly i begin to grin


I know where i fit
Assosciated with happiness.
Only known by doubt


Through labour i lift my plight

Dont tell me not to worry.
It only causes stress
Dont tell me not to worry
It doesnt make me worry any less
The fear of your suffering.
Guides me through the night
And though you have assured me.
It does not aid my plight
Please come home
And  tell me to not worry any more
Please come home
Because it will only stop
When your at my door

Im starting to write less and less
and Its scaring me
because I either have no sufferings to write about
or Its all become to much
which one?
how will I know?
whats wrong with my head
Its all twisted up inside
knotted guts struggling to chew through knowledge
am I maturing?
or am I finally turning to dust
I'm sorry if I'm not so sweet to hold,
its difficult when you slip through gaps
like the ones in your fingers
and the holes in your heart

some people think about their poetry
I know many do,
to make sure the  the 3rd and 4th rhyme
to make sure all there lines sing in time
But I have no time for that
Im thousands of years old but bearly 17
so ill blurt
and ill slur
and ill cringe
and ill howl
and ill snip
and ill snap
and splurt
and curse,

I'll walk my fingers to the key board and take of their leashes,
let them run wild in the dog park of my sanity
my ramblings,
they don't need any s
                                      t
                       ­              r
                                   u
                                  c
                           ­          t
                                       u
                                          r
                   ­                          e, nor do my sentences need to make sense
why would I conform To YOUR insanity
when I have my own band brewing like a bathtub bomb
Nothing I say needs to work as hard as my hands do
nothing I need to do should feel as heavy as the souls i carry in my
broken-strapped-bad-backed-back-pack
my alliteration literally doesn't need to alliterate its meaning
and I'm so Tired of Ideas being steam pressed into my head by the maid
that runs this mad house
you'll need to use your hands to eat this poem , I've turned the cutlery
into toy soldiers and their currently occupied in overseas service
so dig into my mind
ill open the front door for you just please remember before you
scoop out my brain
w
  a
   s
    h

       y
         o
           u
             r

                 h
                   a
                     n
                       d
                           s
    
*LG

Dance to the little drum beats.
Skipping through city streets in **** boy cleets.
Dancing  like its no little feat.

Crawling through allways filled with weapers
I find myself at the top. I might be one of the leapers

Dancing on skyline roofs in my freshman hoofs.
I don't have enough proof.

Just this wide blue roof
Falling upwards with a passion  
No distractions.


Black bag blankets and broken tracking anklets
Desperate situations  call for unecasarry fixations

Ive spent to long wrapping myself in ellation
To notice the devastation beneath me.

I see it now

As I fall


So slowly towards the sky

When I say I love you,
I line my words in gold,
tinted silver
When I say I love you
I swing my words with the weight of a boulder,
And if the weight of those three words doesn't connect...
The boulder will take me down
Because when I say I love you,
god when I say your mine
I'm trying to brake out of my plastic mold,  to give your my heart
because I mean it... I Truly do
and my heart brakes with anticipation  and my mind
is so riddled with doubt
but i will call your name from my car
and light my next cigarette..
come darling
I love you..

*LG

they saw me with hatred.
because when they spat lies my horns grew
they saw me as cold
because their words bounced of my steel skin
now they see me with love
because my eyes aren't the stones they used to be
now they see me as warmth
because my colors aren't as dull as the wardrobe i hide  behind my skeletons
you bring out the fire in my heart
bouncing on those thousand year old  billows,
somehow you make my heart hot enough to melt gold
and large enough to be filled with it,
your a catalyst to my cataclysm
but if its the end of the world your going to cause
ill sit and watch, with an arduous passion
because even in my dieng throws i will be made of steel and stone
yet with you standing by my side
i feel like im made out of plasterboard

falling is a weird sensation
I've never failed to fall, tripping on the curb of your hip
more over, I've never failed to fall for you,
that first autumn back lit morning,  the day you caught my eye
and the past is a funny game. i made my move ,
never can i step back to change my ways
and yes...yeh..it hasn't been easy
and no...never, would i ever change it,
because  the rapids of my home river have shaped the boat in which i use to sail, my soul has been carved from limestone cliff faces dangled over by tight lipped trees to tired to give me their secrets you are..
you are a thought. a being I've never come by before
your a bend in the river where the current slows..
your a cliff face with my name carved into it,
even though I've never once taken a knife to your surface
you are comfort,
like looking into a mirror i see myself, and for the first time in my life
for the very first time..
I've looked into a mirror and smiled
and sweet heart I'm going too look into your eyes
and say softly that I'm glad,
I'm glad your a mountain that's already been climbed I'm glad its not my flag that rests in the arrow like crest of your ginger scrawled hair I'm glad
because the men who charge to summits leave nothing but a flag
and some foot prints
i want to be the man for you, the man who climbs your peaks daily..
the one who makes sure your looked after,
a forest ranger to preserve your sanity, to make sure your soul although fractured and aching.
can roam free,
but I've ranted now,
ill sign of my love letter with but a drip of blood,
and a Liter of love,
continue your course sweet heart and you wont need to steal  the chest that houses my heart
ill give you the key
*LG

Do you write poetry to get it all out
Or to hide it?
Do you  write because  you  want to scream
And shout, or because you cant hide it?

I write when  im lonely
When the demons inside me get roudy
When the drugs  come a'howlin
And my familys looking over  me,
Frowning

I write  when the slits on my wrists  look like the telephone  lines i should be calling
But instead of screaming i just end up scrawling
All my pathetic  overstated  woes
Right here

So  facilitate  me, you strangers
Love this post.  Even though i hate it
Youve no idea the dangers im in
Trying to stay  away from that whole bottle of gin
In the corner

Facilitate  my anxieties
Show me your  all just sheep
Flocking  to  litterature like the  bowls of soup attract the meak

Im not a person here.
None of you really care
Are you even self aware
Do you know That even though its poetry
Theres a person  there?

Dancing little kitten
Plying for my toes
Just the tinniest flinch of movement.
And away your paws go.
To cling to my toes and my fingers
To swing at my nose
Soft kisses  are like wishes little kitten,
They rarely help.
But like wishes, soft kisses
Are allways felt
So  crawl back to my arms
Tears sting skin like sandpaper
Crawl back to my arms little kitten
Ill show you dont need a maker

You are indefinable,
perfectly perplexed between a periapse of compassion
you are..
the light between colors, that blends everything together,
you are the smell of cooking spices and the strut of  a supermodel
you have the smile of an angel, the cheek of a demon
you are a time capsual of happiness and a roving epiphany of delinquent change.
a goddess of chaos and order squished between two slices of cute and served with a side order of Mine
so smile sweet heart, brighten those chameleon eyes
let those lips make points at either side
let your hair hang losely over that speckled forhead
that serves as a runway for my kisses
smile sweetheart.
I love you

*LG

how likely am i, to be what i am
then how likely you are to be  but a scar
I am Not A steryotype,
i am archaic in my design, so fail me not in my attempts to justify myself
but allow me to traverse the insantity of my delusion ,

delinquint similarities rattle us to the core, yes.
but thou hast taken to devouring my being
i know i prolong my suffering with intermitten relapses
but my storm in a tea cup is just chaos incarnate,
dont devour my soul , but take my heart, let me love you like only i know how
in a fashion that only you shall recieve


my dear you are not one of thousands, or hundreds or dozens akin
you are only one, and one only for me
dont despise my loss of time, or addiction to the unsavoury,
but take me to a place i have not seen, to see a part of myself
yet unseen
you think i am disposed and discovered, traversed by all manner of explorers,
not true,
you are the first to try unravel how i have formed, geographic mountainscapes carved from a violent and reactive past can be cut down to feilds
just pull me a part one pebble at a time

I...
I'm .. I.. I'm sorry
please forgive me.
I don't know what I've done
but I think I broke you.
and I understand your life is a roller coster
and that Sometimes existing is too much of a weight to bear
And I get the fact your walk in closet Is  stuffed to the brim with
the skeletons of your past
And I understand. that those useless bags of flesh and bones keep trying to come back to life
and crawl out of the back door and into your mind
but I cant help feel that im to blame,
And I know im not..
but I think I broke you
and I know my well timed excuses threw a spanner in the  tracks of your roller coster
but I thought i was going o.k.
And I know the grip i have on you isn't deadly...
but ive realised that you are nowhere near mine..
you can walk away at any moment and im still the one at fault.
but I love  you
you cought me in both arms when The only other option was to land on my  face
so please dont let me fall now
all This time i thought you where a porcelain doll..
who knew i was made of craft paper