I want something i cant have

Something ive had before, soft and tender,

Something that isnt mine

Something thats on my mind

A woman

I am in pain
I ache
I bleed
Dry
Tired

Weak

You are a failure,

Your world  lives in a mirage

How much did you think it would help

Guilt and disgust for yourself

Leave it be, or dig  deeper,

Your ambition has blindly lead you to a cliff

Hear i am to open my eyes and jump

I hope you know
Theres a Poloroid of you
On my wall.
4 years and 13 days to the date
You disappeared,
I loved you then
You danced across wood floors
Dropped jaws
You spun me up in your silk

You made me feel flawless from a hundred miles away
I wished I could spend every day with you
I still do

I don't know where you are now,
the world swallowed you whole
Im tired
And cold
And you  brought me warmth
I just wondered if you where wondering
That after all this time
If I still kept that Poloroid  of you
On my wall

I'm alone now
Night sounds
Cicadas chirp incessantly.
The rain falls so softly
I know that no one's around

Blackberrys on the ground,
Wilting
The wind curls around me
No shelter
The  echos bounce around me
No sleep

When I get home, they'll be nothing to eat
But my good intentions

18 months in a brick shed  with a tin roof
6 more in a wood box too cramped  to breathe
Another year
Living in fear
In a room with no lock
And in 3 more weeks
I'll get my own place
No doors that don't close
No windows that don't open

I spent three years of my life in moldy decrepid rot
And now after removing a thot
I find myself in a happy space
A dog named squirt and  a kitchen two steps wide
My girlfriend looking at me with pride
4 months ago I'd never imagine
That today's the day  I move to my own
Mansion

Crystal parts
Broken hearts
I've been hiding all my fears
In this pipe
For far  to many years

So you've moved on,
I mean I know it didn't take you this long
But I still haven't
When i think about you it still hurts where my heart  used to be,
But that's ok
You needed to go your way

I just wish that your was a path that didn't go straight through someone else's ****
I wish you had the corage to end it
Before  you rolled  Me over
And ****** me with my heart

But that's ok I get it
We all make mistakes
And what breaks me one day builds me up the next (I've been told)
I just hope you make the right choices
I hope you  find the right faces
And go to to the right places

Just  promise me you'll never forget