a flower opens slowly, at first
but when its personality is set free
it shows in its full bloom

Today I walked to the pier
And I stared into the water
And I wrote and I wrote
I wrote nothings and everythings
And I let some tears out
And I reflected and I laughed a bit
And I had a good old think back
Over everything
Over and over again
And I was afraid that if I stopped writing
I would dive in and swim
Until I couldn't swim anymore
And maybe the water was a much more
Fitting death than a leap
From a tall library window
Or one feet first in front of a train
But I'm about to finish writing
And despite all my failures
And disappointments
There's something faint
Telling me to keep going
And I don't know what's worse:
That I don't know what it is,
Or that I so desperately want it to *******.

It is of this poet's opinion,
That if a poet was to write
Eleven pages worth of poetry
For one heart-breaking woman,
She must be important.

you,
we're always more than me
but at least I was acknowledged
(by you)
I build you up, because I am less
sharpen your claws in my back
acknowledge me as the step I have become
for you, because I am less
***** me with my own passion
I'll bleed for days
just for you to write your lovers' name
you will always be more, because I am less

You are art
Brush strokes could not define the softness of your smile
Pastels could not express the brightness of your eyes
unbuttoned
Undone
Blues and reds swirling and mixing like watercolors in my stomach

You are art
Picturesque
Intense
Overwhelmingly lovely
Interpretations change but beauty remains
Ink peeks out from your waistband
Drawing me blueprints for where to lay my kisses

You are art
The finest rouge acrylics could not match the delicate pink of your lips
You bite them as my hands color across your body
like an anatomical paint by number

You are art
and I am breathless with admiration
Appreciation
and pure adoration

Today I watched a man go into the sea to swim with his dog.
The urge to drown myself was perhaps the strongest it's ever been.
It scares me