You could wake up and ask yourself
“Why another day?”
Or you could embrace the air
Filling your lungs
And the ruby drops circulating through your veins

You could start your day
With misery and discontent desires
Or you could see the sun within the sky
And appreciate how the moon has died
In order for the love of its life to shine

You could live your life
Wanting things you do not have
Or you could look around and see
You have everything you really need

So child, do not breathe that water into your lungs
Do not let that blade caress your skin
Your blood will flow onto your bed
Staining the porcelain sheets
Your body will be numb and you will feel relief
But dear, relief is not happy
Happy is stepping outside and filling your lungs with life
And not wanting to die

You could be a beautiful, disastrous wreck
Or you could be
Content

honey you can **** me
but only if you're lonely
are you desperate enough?
will you mask your pain with glistening sweat
and hold me down with every breath?
will you tell me you love me
then leave when you're done?
honey, are you lonely enough to need someone?

it's funny how
your muscles have a certain memory of things.

like how you can automatically tie
your shoelaces without even thinking
because you've done it so many times,

and how you can play this one song
on piano without even looking
because you've played it so many times,

and you kind of just lived with it
for a short while.

so when you spend a long enough time with someone
your muscles start to memorize
every action they make like how
they breathe into your chest as if you were the only oxygen left
on earth,
or how they fit perfectly
curled up inside you, like it was what your body
was made for in the first place,
and your bodies remember each other,
every slightest touch
can easily be replayed.

and what's funny is that
i can still remember you
even after all this time,
my muscles still imagine you
next to me
and it's funny that
you're not here anymore
yet my body still knows
where your leg would wrap
over mine (just above the knee)
and it's funny that
i'll never stop loving you
because that's what my muscles
will never forget.

sometimes the scars on my body
get extra bright
sometimes the white in my finger nails
turns yellow
sometimes i think about you
then stop

sometimes i see those scars
and get really scared
sometimes i smoke a cigarette
or 10
sometimes i kiss your mouth
then wake up

you kissed my scars and told me i was                
                       beautiful.
    tell me now, how i can forget about                          
                    someone
                                 like
                                       you